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BEAUTIES OF BYRON. SO. Til. '*J "xscusau...
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*"I knew thelate Lord Falkland well On S...
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COMMON SEKSE, Addressed wthe Lyiubiums O...
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PUNCH—Pam XL1X. London: Pane* Office, 92...
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A BOWL OF "PUuXCII" FJIESUBMWED
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VIVE LA. GUERRE! A WAlt SOSO FOB THE rBE...
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Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software. The text has not been manually corrected and should not be relied on to be an accurate representation of the item.
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^•^Ljljgfg: The Northern Star. 3
^•^ LJLJgfg : THE NORTHERN star . 3
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Beauties Of Byron. So. Til. '*J "Xscusau...
BEAUTIES OF BYRON . SO . Til . ' * J " xscusauiSDs ' ssa scotch reviewers . " in twin the following lines die poes lashes the fashion . dca-ailc ' rad virions of ids own ' order : "Dlhcre There the hired eunuch , the Hesperian choir , ee melbe meltiag lute , the soft lascivious lyre , ae so » he so » g from Italy , the sup ft » na France , 06 niidhe midnight orgy , and the mazy dance , me swine smile of beauty , and the flush of wine , m-fopsor fops , fools , gamesters , knaves , and lords combine : och toach to his humour—Coaius all allows ; aampshampagBC , dice , music , or your nei ghbour ' 5 sxiouse . Ilk nCalk not to u > , j e starving sons of trade !
j piteef piteous ruin , which ourselves have made ; i Flero Plenty * s sunshine i ' urtui-e ' s uiintons bask , » r tiii ' or think of poverty , except" « ii uiasimcy * hbtn fThtn for the aigbt some lately titled ass ippealppears the beggar which his grand ^ ire was . ahe wfhe curtsiu dmpp'd , tlie gay burietta o ' er , die au'ho audience take their turn upon the tluot ; DOW r £ ow round the room the circling dou ' gtrssweep , oow in " o < v in loose waltz the thin-dad daughters leap ; bhe Hike first in ltrHgthen'd line majestic swim , the bf he last display the iree unfetttaM limb ! IboseThose for Jfiiwnia ' s lusty sous n-pair fTith ffith art the charms w ' licb nature could not spare ; tbeselhcse after husbands wing their eager flight , « or l * or leave much mystery for the nuptial nigh J . Oh Oh ! blest retreats of infamy and case , tVhciffhere , all torgutteu but the power to please ,
SachEacli mail may give a louse lo genial tkoughr , SSacbEach sw . tin may teach new systems , or be taught : TherThere the Withe youngster , just return'd from Spain , EutsCuts the light pack , or calls the rattling main ; ( The The jovial caster * set , ai , d seven's the nick , X ) r—Or—done I—a thousand on the coming trick ! [ If is If mad with less , existence , ' gins to tin ; , ( And And all your hope or wish is to expire , HIer Here ' s Powell ' s pistol ready for your life , ( And And , kinder stUl , two Pagcts for your wife ; IFIt Fit consummation of an earthly race , UJeg Uegun iu folly , ended iu disgraw . ; ' Wii While none bat menials o ' er ! h = bed of death , "ffa "Wash thy red wounds , or watch thy wavering breath ; 'Trs Traduced by liars , and forgot by all , ' Thi The mangled licam of a drunken brawl , ,, 'To To live like Clodhti , aud like Palkland fall . *
' Truth ! rouse some genuine bard , and guide his band , To To drive this pestilence from out the bind ! B '< E ' en 1—least thinking of a thoughtless throng , Jo Just skill'd to know the right and choose the wrong , Ft Free'd at that age when reason's shield is lost , I < To fight my course through passion ' s countless host , } "W 'Whom every path of pi .-asurc ' s flowery way 11 Has lured in turn , and all have led astray . 15 15 'en I must raise my voice , e ' eu I must feel Si Such scenes , such mtn , destroy the public weal ; A Although some kind , censorious friend will say , " " What art thou better , middling foo ! , t than they 1 " J And every brother rake will smile to sec 1 That miracle , a moralist in me . With the following lines—the conclusion of the j poem—we dose our extracts from English Bards and i Scotch Reviewers : —
Thus far I've told my unuisturb'd career , J Prepared for rancour , steel'd ' gainst selfish fear - . ' This thing of rhyme I ne ' er disdain'd to own , Though not obtrusive , yet not quite unknown : ' . My voice was heard again , though not so loud , My page , though nam » Itss , never disavow'd ; Aud now at uuee I tear the veil away ! ' Cheer on the pack ; the quarry stands at bay , TJnscared oy all the din of Melbourne House , By Lawbc * zv ^ cBt-aen * , or by Holland ' s spouse , By Jeffrey ' s harmless pistol , Jlallam ' s rage , Soma ' s brawny suns and brimsioue page . Our men in burkiam shall have blows enough , And feel they too " are penetrable stuff : " And though I hope not tlumce unscathed to go , ¦ Who conquers ine shall find a stubborn foe . The time hath been , when no harsh sound would fall
From lips that now may seem imbued with gall ; Xor fools nor follies tempt me to despise The meanest tluttg that crawl'd beneath my eyes : Bat now , so callous grown , so changed since youth , Fve learn'd to think , anl sternly speak the truth ; Learn'd to dcrile the critic ' s starch decree , And break him on the wheel he meant for me ; To spurn the rod a scribbler bids me kiss , Kor care if courts and crowds applaud or hiss : . Nay , more , though all aiy rival rhymesters frown , I , too , can bunt a poetaster down ; And , arcrd iu proof , the gauntlet cast at once To Scotch marauder and to southern dunce . Thus much I ' ve dared ; if my incondite lay Hath wroug'd these righteous times , let others say : This , let the world , which knows not how to spare , Yet rarely blames unjustly , now declare .
*"I Knew Thelate Lord Falkland Well On S...
* "I knew thelate Lord Falkland well On Sunday night 1 beheld him presiding at his own table , in all the honest pride of hospitality ; ou Wednesday morning , at three o ' clock , I sawstrctclTed before me all that remained < jf courage , feeling , and a host of pass-ions . " —Byron . { "Lord Falkland was killed iu a duel by a Air . Powell in isw . it was « ut by words ouly that l * rd Byron gave proof of sympathy ou the melanchol y occasion . * Though bis own difficulties pressed ou him at the time , he contrived to administer relief to the widow and children of his friend . " } f "Yes : and a precious chase thev led me . "—Byron , 1816 . i' ^ OOl enough , certainly , then , and no wiser since . " — Byron , ltiI 5 .
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Common Sekse, Addressed Wthe Lyiubiums O...
COMMON SEKSE , Addressed wthe Lyiubiums OfAmeiuca . Bt Thomas Palvb . London z B . D . Cousins , IS , Duke-street , Lincoln ' s-inn-fields . Amongst the excellent works advertised in this paper by Mr . Cocsiss , the writings of the celebrated Thomas Paixe occupy a prominent position , and claim a few words irora us in introducing tliem to onr readers . Wc bopc to speak of Thomas Pake ' s productions , or , at least , the chief of them , ser iatim ; for the present we shall confine ourselves to a few words on his Common Sense , the firat-vritten of his political works , and though by no means the best , yet the most important in its results . Of course we speak of results yet seen . His celebrated fiigais of Man is yet performing its mission ; and the mighty results which it has helped to sow the seeds of , have yet in their fulness to be produced , but produced thev will be .
Tlusjitue tract , Common Sense , is now somewhat ont of date—it was written for a special purpose , and well it served that purpose , that of inducing the Americans to throw oif the British yoke . Consisting for the most part of reflections on " the then state of American affairs ( 1 nO ) , and arguments showing the necessity ami practicability of independence—it is chiefly valuable as an historical document , audits ralne in that respect cannot be orer-estiraated . In centuries to come , when the historian shall set himself to the task of describing the birth of the great republic of the West , this modest little pamphlet will be his first thought , and its contents the choicest of the stores from which to gather the materials for his historv .
The agitation against the " mother-country , " or rattier against the men and measures under " which the colonist * suffered , had continued far years , and even actual hostilities had gon 3 on for some months before any one seems to have thought of the only object worth strtiggiingand fighting for , the independence of the colonics ; at least if thought of , the thoaght was not avowed . Thus the colonists were in the anamulous position of subjects fighting against their ( yet acknowledged )' lawful sovereign . Iu this position they were rebels , liable to military execution if captured or conquered , and shut out , if not from the sympathies , at least from the help of other nations , who , while they might be disposed to assist an independent power m its war with Britain , were not likely to give assistance to mere revolted subjects . This consideration alone was sufficient to induce Thomas P . u . \ e to take the side of independence ; he saw that there was no road to justice and safety but throa : h vicforr . and that to be victors the colonists
fflna as a nation call forth their national resources , and challt n ; c the sympathies of other states iu their behalf . Accordingly Thcmas P . UXE produced this little work . 1 he powerful arguments be brought forward msnpport of his proposition that the colonists should sever their connexion with Britain , were unanswerable and nnassailablc ; and the fruits were spccdilv v \ h ' « i ~ st cd " lt 5 on of { ,, e FaH 1 Pblet bore date , ; . 14 t , . ' \ < •?» "d so rapid was the conversion of public o pinion to the doctrine of independence , that miess than hvc months fmm the first appearance « the pamphlet , a Continental Congress had as-« uiMcdand proclaaji « l ( on the 4 th of Julv , 177 G ) « ie colonies to be "Freeand Independent States ;" -he consc ience of thai declaration , all . men know . "elebr ? 'I * spccI " ' a or l ' vo of tUe clofjuciice of this
_ . THE TIME . m SUa ? ever s , i ' ncd on a cause of greater worth . It is dm * ' ?; " ofa v % t a country , a province , orof akins-11 i fa C 0 ' ' Jt » t—of , at least . one-c % lith part of ^ e hatataiae ^ lohe . It is not the concern of a day , a will b a = I , ostOTit ?»« involved in the contest , and thci ^ ° v 0 rkSSaeVcted ' cven tot , Ie " » fi' « fti « ne . » y anion , v . f " ° s ™ v - ^ uwisthe seed-time of continental uelike a ' , aud honour . The least fracture now , will tandor t ^ T ^ eEsraved " 5 rftlx tllc V olat of 3 P 5 n on tue -J » c tre- ' - " a * ° ^ ' ^ wound will enlarge with * ' '"' " ^ teSiyread it in full-grotra characters . Xonwav ^ coxciMATiay . ni" < tlfb ' a '"' , ran :, '" r wisher for reconcniation than U » mr * f » * ^" 8 fatal 19 iU cf Aj , ri ' ' ' ' but t 3 ie aiomcn £ liard <™ i i ! U : lt ^ , ras raa ( le known . 1 reacted * be and dfadTi ^ ^' teaiJierca rh ^ oah of England for ever , « f 1 ' arii . ^ . rr , vvreldl ' t ! la * mth ihe pretended tillo flauM ,, ! , eo * ' ean unfcdaislv h « 'r of their * onC composedly sleep witli their blood upon his 0 ^ fl » EEB 051 ' S SEFCCE . je that love mankind ; ye that dave oppos-c , not owly ' iwmiy . fiat the tyrant , stand ' forth ; evcrv spot of
Common Sekse, Addressed Wthe Lyiubiums O...
the old world is overrun with oppression . Freedom hath been hunted round the globe . Asia an I Africa have long expelled her , Europe regards her like a stranger , and England hath given her warning to depart . 0 receive the fugitive ! and prepare in tini 4 an asylum for mankind . Englishmen may be justly proud that Tiwms 1 aise was a native of their tatueviawl , aud a ' way will come when those honours will be paid to his name and memory , which , ' though long since due , never can be discharged until the many shall be free . We confess that our dislike of many things American is considerably strengthened by the ' fact oV the almost total disregard in which Paixb ' s name appears to be no-. v held in the State * . In Pake ' s lifetime the American Congress was not ungrateful for his
services , and of the return made by that body ta the man who had so signally aided the country they represented , wc complain not . What we complain of is , that while almost divine honours are paid to the memories of Washington , Jefferson , and others of the great spirits of the revolution , the name of 1 'ai . vi ; is passed over with iuditiereiice . Is it because he was only an adopted , not a " native" citizen of the Republic ? - Whatever be the cause , the injustice is evident , and for the sake of the American character is to be deplored . In the two first chapters of Common . St-nsc , there is mixed up with much that is excellent , something that is unsound . All the writer ' s arguments against monarchy and hereditary succession are pwlectiv
unexceptionable , ihe unsoundness we allude to is , where I ' alvk represents the Crown as ' . the overbearing part of the English Constitution , and that the despotism existing in England owes its existence to the fact of the Crown having engrossed the Commons . To a certain extent this , was perhaps true in Paixe ' s day , though even then the " overbearing" power of the Crown could not have existed but for the corruption and baseness of the Commons . The Commons before Paixe ' s timehad twice shown that their power far exceeded that of the Crown . " - First , they had deposed and put to death the King , following that up by abolishing th House of Lords ; second , they deposed and expelled another Kim . ' , and invited a foreigner to take his place . Subsequently these
"rascal Commons" passed a law to enable them to retain their seats for seven years , and for sixty years resisted all attempts made from within or without to reform their constitution . Even in Pake ' s time , therefore , the " preponderating influence of the Crown" arose solely from the corruption of ihe Commons . But in thepresent day it would be farcical to talk about the " preponderating influence of the Crown , " the Crown having , in reality , no influence at all . The monarch is now a mere gilded puppet , the Lords have degenerated into mere registrars oi the edicts of the Commons , the Ministers ( who for the time being , share the monarchy amongst them ) owe all their power to the Commons . The House ot Commons is England ' s real Governnicnt , and England ' s despotism . But , that house itself is but the
creature of the electoral body , which body is , therefore , responsible for the existence of the present despotism , and all the crimes , and all the wrongs of which that despotism is the author and perpetrator . The profitocracy , tho kings of Hie shops , are the real enemies of the peoples' rights , and the only class , whose power is formidable , that stands between the many and justice . In reading Common Sense the reader must bear in mind that the ideas of the author , as a political writer , were by no means matured at the time he penned this work : it is in his later productions that we must look for teaching more applicable to the present time , and times'to come . The following extracts will , however , show that . Common Sense is not deficient in useful instruction even for the present period : —
jsocrerr axd GorsssiTBST . Some writers have so confounded Society with Government , as to leave little or no distinction between them ; whereas they- are not only dia ' crent , but have different origins . Society is produced by our wants , and Govern , ment by our wickedness ; the former promotes our happiness positively , by uniting our affections : the latter negatively , by restraining our vices . The one encourages intercourse , the other creates distinctions . The first is a patron , the last a punisher . Society , in every state is a blessing , but Government , even in its best state , is but a necessary evil ; in its worst state , an intolerable , one ; for when we suffer , or are exposed to the same miseries ow a Government , which we might expect in a country without GoMriuiWiit , our
calamity is heightened by reflecting , that we furnish the means by which we suffer . Government , like dress , is the badge of lost innocence ; the palaces of Kings are built on the ruins of the bowers of Paradise . Por , were the impulses of conscience clear , uniform , and irresistibly obeyed , man would need no other lawgiver ; but that not being the case , he finds it necessary to surrender up a part of his property to furnish means for the protection of the rest ; and this he is induced to do by the same prudence which in every other case , advises him out of two evils to choose the least . Wlterefore security being the true design and end of Government , it unanswerably follows , that whatever form , thereof appears most likely to ensure it to us with the least expense and greatest benefit , is preferable to aU others .
MONABCUT AND HEBEDITABX SUCCESSION . To the evil of Monarchy we have added that of Hereditary Succession -, and as the first is a degradation and lessening of ourselves , so the second , claimed as a matter of right , is an insult aud imposition on posterity , l ' or all men being originally equals , no one by oirth could have a right to set up his own family in perpetual preference to all others for ever ; and though himself might deserve some decent degree of honours of bis contemporaries , yet his descendants might be far too unworthy to inherit them . One of the strongest natbiul proofs of the folly of Hereditary right in Kings is , that nature disapproves it , otherwise she would not so frequently turn it into ridicule by giving mankind an ass for a lion .
Secondly , as no man at first could possess any other public honours than were bestowed upon him , SO the givers of those honours could hare no right to giveaway the right of portcrity . Awl though they might say , " > Ve choose you for our head , " they could not , without manifest injustice to their children , say , " that your children , and your children ' s children , shall reign over ours for ever , " because such an unwise , unjust , unnatural compact might , perhaps , in the next succession , put them under the government ofa rogue or a fool . Most wise men , iu their private sentiments , have ever treated Hereditary Right with contempt ; yet it is one of those evils which , when ouce established , is not easily removed ; many submit from fear , others from superstition , aud the most powerful part shares with the King the plunder of the rest .
England , since the conquest , hath known some few good ilonarchs , but groaned beneath a much larger number of bad ones , yet no maw in bis senses can say that their claim under William the Conqueroris a very honourable one . A French bastard landing with an armed banditti , and establishing himself King of England , against the consent of the natives , is , in plain terms , a very paltry , rascally original . It certainly hath no divinity in it . However , it is needless to spend nruch time in exposing the folly of Hereditary Right ; if there are any so weak as io believe it , let them promiscuously worship the ass and the lion , and welcome ; I shall neither copy their humility nor disturb their devotion .
Another evil which attenushcreditary succession is , that the throne is liable to be possessed by a minor at any age ; all which time the regency , acting under the cover of a king , have every opportunity aud inducement to betray their trust , -The same national misfortune happens lvhen a king , -worn out with age and infirmity , enters the last stage of human weakness . In both thcfc cases the public becomes a prey to every miscreant who can tamper with the follies cither of age or infancy . The most plausible pica , -which hath ever been offered iu favour of hereditary succcssiou is , that it preserves a nation from civil wars ; and were this true , it would be weighty ; whereas , it is the most barefaced falsity ever imposed upon mankind . The whole History of England disowns the fact . Thirty kings and two minors have reigned in that distracted kingdom since the Conquest , in which time there have been ( including the Revolution ) no less than eight civil wars and nineteen rebellions . Wherefore , instead of making for peace , it makes against it , and destroys the very foundation it seems to stand on .
If we inquire into the business of a king , wc shall find that in some countries they have none ; : md after sauntering away their lives without pleasure to themselves or advantage to the nation , withdraw from the scene and leare their successors to tread the same idle ground . In absolute monarchies the whole weight of business civil and military , lies on the king ; the children of Israel , in their request for a Jdng-, ur ^ cd this plea , "that he may judge us , aud go out before us and fig ht our battles , " Hut in connirits where he is neither a judge nor a general , a man would be puzzled to know what is his business . * * * * In England the king hath little more to do than to make war and give away p laces ; which , in plain terms , is to impoverish the nation and set it together by the ears . A pretty business , indeed , for a man to be allowed eight hundred thousand sterling a year for , and worshipped into the bargain . Of more worth is one honest man to society , and in the sight of God , than all the crowned ruffians that ever lived .
Some ofouv old soldiers of freedom may think it superfluous to call attention in this 1815 to the works of Paws ; if so , we must be permitted to think otherwise . The boys of a few years ago are young men now , and these young men have , in all probabilitv , an important part to perform iu the future ; it is , therefore , essential that tlvciv TOUids SMOUlU « C well prepared against the dnv of conflict aud the hour of victory . Thomas Paixe " will not teach them all they must learn , but he is an excellent schoolmaster to begin with . No other apology can be necessary for these remarks , or for those we may offer on future occasions when calling atlcntion to the works of this great Englishman . The price of this pamphlet om readers will see in Mr . Cousins' advertisement , and we hope that all who have not a copy by them , . will exhibit their common sense by forthwith obtaining it .
Punch—Pam Xl1x. London: Pane* Office, 92...
PUNCH—Pam XL 1 X . London : Pane * Office , 92 , Fleet-slwet . - The contents of . this partare « enera % excellent ; wc must , however , except the following : —
Punch—Pam Xl1x. London: Pane* Office, 92...
Asornrx xorxc one . A new journal has been" started . at Now . York , called Yoiih ^ America . We believe the principles it advocates are—universal repudiation , miut-juleps , no taxes , and a tarnation thrashing to all the world . This is a sacrifice of truth to what , wc presume , is intended for wit , but the wit , if there be amy is too small for us to discover . What the principles of Young America really are , Punch may discover by merely taking the trouble to learn the principles of this paper . For further information , we refer our fr iend of the hunch to the extracts from Young Amrica in our seventh pane .
The inimitable "Caudle Lectures , " now read throughout Europe and America , are continued in this part , as rich and racy as ever . The articles on the llahara atrocity , and the infamous case of soldierflogging at Windsor , are of priceless worth , and calculated to most materially serve the cause of humanity and progress . Weil , remarks the writer of one these articles ( " The Cat at Windsor " ) : — How very handsome is a regiment in all its flutter and glory of flags and fine trappings ! Yet let us pick the regiment to pieces—reduce it to units—and what a miserable soul-and-body bartered creature is the son of glory who , if his manhood revolt at indignity , may be lashed like a brute . Think of these matters—glory-loving youngster 'especially think of them , when the recruiting serjeant may welt to tempt j ou with the destroying shilling !
The illustrations arc , as usual , excellent— . the best in this part arc " The Man wot plays several instruments at once , " and " Purifying Covent Garden Theatre . "
A Bowl Of "Puuxcii" Fjiesubmwed
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Vive La. Guerre! A Walt Soso Fob The Rbe...
VIVE LA . GUERRE ! A WAlt SOSO FOB THE rBENCH I . V ALGIEBS In Dahra ' s caverns hidden Bide the Arabs , and delay To yield when they are bidden -, So cries brave Pelissier" Bring faggots Of fierce fuel ! Frenchmen checked by Arab slaves ! We'll have a vengeance cruel ! Roast them in their sacred caves 1 We'll make their fond trust falttr ! Cast in faggots ! Let them flare , Till vengeance hath an altar Fitly furnish'd ! Vive la guerre !" Rush the sparks in rapid fountains Up abroad into the sky ! From the bases of the mountains leap the fork'd flames mountain-high ! The Haines , like devils thirsting ,
Lick the wind , where crackling spars Wage hellish warfare , worsting All the still , astonished stars ! "Ply the furnace , fling the faggots ! Lo , the flames writhe , rush , and tear ! And a thousand writhe like maggots In among them ! Vive la gu « rre . ' A mighty wind is blowing T ' wards the cavern ' s gaping mouth The clear , hot dames arc flowing In and in , to glut its drouth ; Flames with winds roar , rave , and battle-Wildly battle , rave , and roar ; And cries of men and cattle Through tho turmoil sadly soar . Wc are pale ! What ! shall a trifle , A sad sound , our hold hearts scare ? 'lis long before they stifle ! Bring more faggots I Hue la guerre !
With night hegan the burning ; Look where yonder comes the day . ' Hark ! signals for adjourning Our brave sport . We must obey ! But be sure the slaves are lveary . ' —• As the short and sob-like sigh Of gusts on moorlands dreary Float their sinking voices by ;—No sound comes now of shrieking ;—Let us show what Frenchmen dare I Force the caves , through vapours reeking Like a kitchen ! Vive la guerre ! What ' s this—and this ? Pah ! sick ' niag , Whether woman , man , or beast . Let us on . The fumes are thiek'ning!—Ho ! here ' s that hath shape at least . Dow its homy eyes are staring Oft that infant , seeking food From its broad brown breast , still bearing
Smokc-dvicd stains of tuuk and mooul At our work do any wonder , Saying , " Frenchmen love tho fair" ! Such "fair" ? Ha ! ha ! they blunder Who thus twit us ! Vive la guerre ! What's that , so tall and meagre 1—Kay , bold Frenchmen , do not shrink !—< 'Tis a corpse , with features eager , Jiiinin'd for air into a chink . Whence is that hysteric sobbing !—Nay , bold Frenchmen , do not draw 1 'lis an Arab ' s parch'd throat throbbing . Frenchmen h » ve sweet Mercy ' s law :- — Jfake way there ! Give him breathing J How he smiles to feel the air ! His breath seems incense wreathing To sweet Mercy ! Vive la guerre / And now , to crown our glory , Get we trophies , to display As vouchers for our story ,
And mementos of this day ! Once more , then , to the grottoes ! Gather each one all he can—Blister'd blade with Arab mottoes , Spear-head , bloody yataghan . Give room now to the raven And the dog , who scent rich fare ; And let these words be graven On the rock-side— "Vive la guerre !' Tho trumpet sounds for marching . ' Ou ! alike amid sweet meads , Morass , or desert parching , Wheresoe ' er our captain leads ! To Pelissicr sing praises ! Praises sing to bold Bugeaud ! Lit up by last night ' s blazes
To all time their names will show ! Cry " conquer , kill , anil ravage ' . " Never ask " who , what , or where 1 " f civilised , or savage , Never heed , but— Vive la guerre !
Tllf. Dckj - Asd Tub Pvatcatcuer.— Tllc ...
TllF . DCKJ ASD TUB PvATCATCUER . — TllC DultC of Buckingham has a fine eye for a happy peasantry . On a ltoyal visit to Stowe , his Grace can group a thousand tillers of the soil—in snowy smock frocks , washed expressly for the occasion—with the taste of a ballet-master . The Duke is the farmer ' s friend ; and , therefore , descending a little in his benevolence , he is the friend of tho labourer . Nevertheless / his Grace is a greater friend to leverets , though they shall not be bigger than kittens . In the cast there are asylums aud hospitals for reptiles ; and the man who could with meekest serenity contemplate the wants of his fellow biped , , would feel the tendcrcst pity for a cock roach or a lizard . And in this spirit
do some of our gentlemen of England— Merry England , " as sometimes , with a knowing look and tongues in their checks , they call it—preserve their game . Fine , imprison , grind to the dust the peasant —but preserve the game 1 Heap hot coals upon the grey head of the labourer—but preserve the game ! Be deaf to the goodly reputation of forty years , and punish the dog in the pauper master { for they arc one and the same thing ) , but—preserve the game ! The Duke of Buckingham ( represented by one of his gamekeepers ) appeared a few days since at the Buckingham petty sessions against a " vcnerahle-Iooking man , " although a rat ratcher , named William White . Fearful odds «< Tho judges wove rangeda terrible show ; " for they were three preachers of
the word of'God , "the Iter . Messrs . "Eyre , Andrews , and Eayncs . " The offender , White , had caught rats for forty years ; aud iu that time had never been cited before a magistrate , lie had a wife and five children to support ; and ( rat-catching was not the best of trades , the reverend magistrates themselves misht allow that ) at times it was a hard matter with him to get his crust in an honest way . lie was crossing the public road , followed by three dogs . One of them went into a ditch , and brought out and killed a "leveret as big as a kitten ; " whereupon the officer of the Duke of Buckingham—the labourer's
friendcited the dog ' s master before the beach . And then did these reverend men take counsel one with another ; and , sympathising with the wrongs ot the coroneted owner of the leveret " as big as a kitten , thev ordered William White to " pay 18 s ., and in ; defanit fourteen days' imprisonment . " William Yi lmc handed in a written testimonial of good character , signed by many men of good report ; and the reverend magistrates—what could they do ?—looked at the document , and still the sentence was— " 18 s ., or fuuvtettv days * imprisonment . " Kot a shitting , not . a day was abated : but mercy was not wholly banished from the court ; time was given to the rat-catcher to
earn the money . Thus , William \ Y lute—his lamiij , to be sure , will be pinched a little for bread the while —may be enabled to discover how many vats make the value of one " leveret as big as a kitten . " He may also learn the true value of character ; may teel how worthless is the reputation of forty years' honest toil when his dog kills a leveret " as big as a Jn ' tten . And thus at beer-houses , by the way-side , aud at the cottage-hearth , will the tale of the ' naughty William White go round ; and , it is natural to suppose it , , a universal love for the Duke of Buckingham in the
individual , and reverence for aristocracy in the abstract , will sink into the hearts of tlie storytellers . And thus will the reputation of the Duke of Buckingham descend . For though he vnav not mark his name in his country ' s councils—though , with the exception of the £ 50 clause , he may never be known as a legislator—still his name may " travel from generation to generation of rustics , written in the blood of '' leverets as big as kittens . " Yet is not all our sympathy for William White . No : we feel a touch ot compassion lor his reverend judges . Apostolical as they must be . ws can imagine theiraoral struggles ,
the acuteness of their sufferings , when called upon" to levy a crushing ( mc upon a . venerable old man who ins ived a life ot honesty and toil , for that iiis dog haskdlcd » « Jercret as Wg as a kitten . " Sure wc aie tuat , witu their peculiar caste of thought , they must now and then ask themselves whether leverets , anymore than field-mice , were sent upon the earth to lie ticketed as the sacred property of anv one owner . It is unfortunate that , when ; i game-Jaw sentence ' uf peculiar cruelty is to be pronounced , a clergyman is generally on the bench to utter it . To be sure this may give more solemnity to the sacrifice , as in the olden day the victim was always sacrificed bv a priest . —Punch .-
Monstrous Case Of Cbim. Con. Croydon, Au...
MONSTROUS CASE OF CBIM . CON . CROYDON , August 15 . ( Before Lord Chief Justice Tindal and a Common Jury . ) COOKE V . WKI 1 IERELL , CLEUK . This was an action brought by the plaintiff against the defendant , 1 ' or criminal conversation with his wife . The case is of a most extraordinary character , and it is said that the damages were laid at £ 50 , 000 . .. A ' - pfrjeant Slice , Mr . Montagu Chambers , and Mr . Ldwin James were for the plaintiff ; Mr . Serjeant C / iamiell , Mr . Clarkson , aud Mr . Lush , for the defendant .
Mr . Want Slice opened the ease , aud said the nlaintift . was Air . John Myndc Coolsc , a young man , an attorney , who was very respeetablv connected , the son of Mr . Cooke , of Capel Court , " Herefordshire , and he came into court to complain of the most serious injury that could be inflicted by one man upon another , an injury that had embittered the morning oi his life , and which must deprive him of all happiness hereafter . The defendant was a man of fifty-five , a minister of the Church of England , and at nresent the rector of By field , in Northamptonshire , and when he told ihenv that he was charged with incest and adultery with his own daughter , he was sure the jury would give him credit for feeling the deep responsibility of his task , in having to lav such a case before
them . He would endeavour to lay the facts of this almost unexampled case before them with as much calmness as he could command , and would give the jury that evidence which , in his opinion , made out a clear and unanswerable . ' case on the part of the plaintiff . The defendant was most respectably connected . Ho had married a daughter of a gentleman who at the time filled the office of chief magistrate of the City of London , and through his influence he obtained tho rectory of Byfield , which was worth £ 1100 a year , and also had a fortune of £ 20 , 000 with his wife , who , however , had the control over thatsum , and she settled it upon her daughter , the lady whose misconduct was that day the subject of their inquiry . In 1839 , after her mother ' s death , the youns lady
came of age , and the money was then transferred by the trustees to her name and came under her control , and it . appeared that her father took a splendid mansion in Eaton-place , where he lived in a style oi great splendour , and far beyond his means , and it would appear that with the consent of theyounglady , her fortune was by degrees drawn from the Bank of England , and eventually entirely squandered away within a little more than two years from the period of the young lady coming of age . Tlie p laintiff was introduced to the family of the defendant about this time . lie was a young man of between one and two and twenty . He had just been admitted an attorney , and was very successful in his profession , and having a fortune of his own to the extent of £ 8000 , the
brightest prospects were before him . In the summer of 1842 , he met Miss Wethcrcll ; he was pleased with her person , and he eventually offered her his hand , and was accepted . Mr . Cooke was sincerely attached to the young lady , but he would not deny that he did expect to receive some fortune with his wife . LJcr father objected to the marriage , and the terms of his refusal of Mr . Cooke were barely civil , and eventually they were married without his consent at St . George ' s Church , llanovcr-squarc . The young couple went on a tour for a short time , and upon their return the father appeared to be friendly , and they went to pay him a visit at his rectory at Byfield . Two or three days had hardly elapsed when a gentleman named Nisbct made iiis appearance , and produced an
acceptance of Miss IVctiiereli ' s tor £ 500 , and insisted upon his right to look to the newly-married husband for payment . The plaintiff was shocked at the news , and he felt that he had been cruelly deceived both by his wife and her father . " He knew that he tvas legally liable for tho debts of his wife , and fie therefores felt that it was absolutely necessary for him to ascertain the exact amount of her liabilities and the real position of her affairs . Notwithstanding that at this moment the plaintiff felt that he was almost entirely ruined by the treachery of his wife and father-in-law , his conduct towards the former appeared to be of the kindest descri p tion , and he read a letter from his wife to the plaintiff , couched in the kindest terms , to bear out his statement . The result of the inquiries
made by the plaintiff satisfied him that his wile was dreadfully involved . All her fortune 'had been squandered , and she had acceptances out to a very large amount , and lie felt it only due to himself to . insist that her father should give an account of his stewardship , and that he should grant him an interview for that purpose . This took place , and the defendant then admitted that he had wasted his daughter's fortune , and that she had nothing left , and that the furniture , houses , and everything tlioy had , had been made over by a bill of safe , or warrant of attorney , to different parties who had advanced money upon them . From this time Mr . Wetlierell offered him every obstruction and opposition to obtaining his rights , and his wife invariably
took the part of ' -hev lather , in resisting his wishes . After having coldly and unwillingly accompanied her husband to London , from Byfield , she eventually returned to ^ her father , and although the plaintiff repeatedly , in tho mustearncst and affectionate manner , entreated her to return to him , she invariably refused , and treated him with the utmost coldness and unkindness , and he believed he should be able to show that the defendant had made the most shameful charges against her husband , and ho in time succeeded in entirely alienating her affections from him . There was , in fiict , a total absence of everything like that kind of feeling ' which could be expected to animate the breast of a young woman of one and twenty towards a man to whom she had been married only
tiro months . " ( iheicarned serjeant here read some letters that had passed between the parties confirmatory of his statement . ) Mr . Cooke at length was compelled to take ' proceedings in Chancery , and eventually a deed was executed , by which the defendant admitted that he was indebted to his daughter in a sum of £ 18 , 000 , and that large arrears of interest were also due to her , and he undertook to repay the amount by yearly instalments of ^ 500 , but to show that Mr , Cooke had acted in a perfectly disinterested manner , he did not take any interest under the deed , but the whole amount was placed under the control and appointment of his wife . Immediately after this deed was executed the defendant wrote a letter to Mr . Cooke , forbidding him his house , or having any
intercourse with his wife , and this was all the return Mr . Cooke received for what he must call his most generous conduct . Tlie learned serjeant then referred te some other proceedings that had taken place , and said that all along the plaintiff ' s wife had evinced the utmost hostility to him , and opposed him in every proceeding he adopted . The plaintiff could not account for such conduct , but at length he received some information which induced the most horrible suspicion upon his mind , and his subsequent inquiries led to tho present charge being made against the defendant . The parties who gave the information had no interest in making such an odious charge against the defendant . They were persons of humble station certainly , but he believed of unblemished character ,
and the result of the 'inquiries made by Mr . Cooke , through their information , left no doubt upon his mind that the defendant had been guilty of the dreadful crime of incest and adultery , lie should call before the jury the servants in the house in Eatonsqharc . and they would prove that they had always entertained a suspicion of the character of the intimacy between the defendant and his daughter , and that having watched , they were satisfied that they were in the habit of continually sleeping together as man and wife , and he should also prove that tho defendant was seen at all hours of the night in his daughter ' s bed-room .- The learned serjeant then stated other facts of a similar character , which need not be further alluded to , but tlie effect of . which he said was to satisfy all the servants that a most
improper intimacy was being carried on . Tlie learned serjeant then proceeded to state that lie should prove that , suspicion having been entertained that Mrs . Cooke was m the family way , from her stout appearance andothcr indications , she bad gone into tlie country with her father , where mifcarriage had evidently taken place . After enumerating other circumstances , the learned serjeant concluded a very able address by observing that to talk of tlie amount ot damages m such a case as this was perfectly unnecessary . If he made it out , he was sure the ' jury would think no amount of damages too large , or that any sum could be a sufficient reparation to the plailltlil lor the cruel injury he had received . Witnesses were then called to bear out the learned counsel ' s statement .
At the close of the plaintiffs case , the further proceedings were adjourned . , „ , „ ; " , "•/ " ;'¦ ' CnoTDox , August 16 . the Court sat at nine o ' clock , and the names of the jury having been called over , the cause proceeded . It was stated that the reverend defendant ; had been in consultation' with his counsel , Mr . Serjeant Ohanncll , until a late hour on the previous night , and it was resolved that no witnesses should be called for the defence , although it was understood there were
a pood many in attendance . . Mi ; . Serjeant Channell proceeded to address the jwy tw tQftutionfenb . He said that the evidence in support ot the plaintiff ' s case having been concluded , it was now for the jury to consider the effect of-that evidence , and it became his duty to make some obseivations respecting it , and he declared that having attentively considered the whole that had been adduced to support the odious charge that was made against the deteivlavit , he did not entertain any tear but that thejury vaiuldfkd a verdict in favour of the
Monstrous Case Of Cbim. Con. Croydon, Au...
defendant . His learned friend had truly described the present proceeding as a prosecution—' the defendant was not there toaiisivcr with iiis life , certainly ; but the effect ofa verdict of guilty would be worse than death —it would render life of no value—there would be an end of all unman happiness , everything that could make life auroeablc or desirable would be destroyed , and life would be a curie . A verdict of guilty would also entail a enrso upon the being to whuui the dciendaiit had given life , aud would place her for the remainder of her days under the most odious ignominy , and would rcmlcv her life a burden . When lie considered these results that must inevitably follow an adverse verdict to the defendant , and looked at tho evidence hy which , such A dreadful charge was sought to be supported , he , however , felt
satisfied that the verdict must be for the defendant , lie would remark to thejury that it was not because persons came forward , and swore positively to certain occurrences having taken place , they were therefore to take it for granted that they were" true . In such an awful charge as the present , he contended that the jur >; ought to insist upon having clear and undoubted testimony before they returned an adverse decision to the party accused of such an odious and horrible offence . Thejury should remember th . it they were not inquiring into tho question whether the defendant had been guilty of follv aud extravagance , or whether he had squandered ' his daughter ' s fortune . It might be very true that he had done so , but the jury had nothing to do with it . The main and only question for them to decide was , whether the
defendant was proved upon undoubted evidence to have been guilty of the foul crimes " incest and adultery ? With regard to the circumstances of the parties , he begged thejury to remember that there was nothing to show that tho defendant and his daughter were not living happily , and in comfort , at the time the plaintiff was first introduced to them , and under what circumstances did the marriage take -. dace ? After only live or six visits , the plaintiff , no doubt , believing them to be persons of wealth , made an offer of marriage , but was refused by the defendant , and then , with the assistance of his friends , Captain Gosdell , Mr . Kccd , and Mr . Waddy , he got the young lady to leave her father's house , and to marry him without her father's consent . It was not very likely that the defendant would at first be friendly with the man who
had acted in such a manner , but there was every reason to believe that the defendant did afterwards receive his son-in-law on friendly terms ; and it was evident , by his endeavouring to let his house in Eaton-square , and the other steps he took , that he was anxious to make what reparation he could for the pas t extravagance , and that he desired to raise a fund for the benstit of his daughter . The defendant did not deny that he had made an improper use of his daughter ' s fortune , and he was willing tomakeall the reparation he could . The jury could sec the hostile feelings exhibited by the plaintiff all through the case . He most improperly took fovciWe possession of the house in Eaton-square , and when he was compelled to leave it through the interference of the magistrate , he went down to Byfield , no doubt , with
the same object . The plaintiff then took his wife to lodgings in W elbeck-strect , aud after they had been there a short time ho left her . Ho entreated the jury to read the letters that had been written to him by his wife after this had taken place , most attentively , for he considered they were a complete answer to the case . He was sure the jury would say it was impossible the . woman-who had written sued letters , teeming with religion and virtue , and with expressions of Jove and kindness for her husband , notwithstanding his ill-usage , could be guilty of the foul crimes imputed to her . It was clear she had an affection for her husband , and it iv . is equally clear that there was a something iu his conduct towards , her , which had not been explained , which rendered it impossible for hey to live with him . It was not possible
for human nature to be so depraved as that ayoung woman could have penned such letters to her husband when she knew that she had been guilty of the crimes of incest and adultery . He entreated them to read the letters attentively , and then ask themselves whether such letters could be written by a foul , disgraced , and abandoned woman , such as the defendant's daughter was sought to be made out to be by these proceedings ? The learned counsel for the plaintiff had sought to make out that the plaintiff had acted very generously to Mr . Wcthcvell with regard to the settlement deed , and said that he had no interest under it . lie ( Mr , Channel !) thought tllC deed bore a very different complexion , for in point of fact the effect and object of it was , to compel , the defendant to repay , by instalments outof his living , the
whole of the money of his daughter that he had improperly expended , and , of course , tho plaintiff , as her husband , would have reaped all the benefit . The plaintiff sought to obtain the advantages of this deed by living with his wife ; and it was only when he failed , and found she was , for sojfc reason which , had not been explained , determined not to live with him , that this action was brought with a view to bring utter ruin and destruction upon both father and daughter . Tlie learned counsel proceeded to make some remarks upon the ivideiice that had been brought forward to make out the horrid charge . If the evidence was to be credited , they were to believe not only that an incestuous intevcousc was carried on between the defendant and his daughter , but that it was carried on under circumstances almost
challenging exposure and detection . Ihe charge , improbable and unnatural as it was in itself , was rendered a thousand times more so by the circumstances under which it was alleged to have been committed . The learned serjeant then commented with great severity upon the conduct of the servants of the defendant who had been examined . ' , ; lie said , it could be conceived that servants might not take notice of any ordinary irregularities in the establishment of their masters , but here the witnesses admitted they had continued , without making remarks , for weeks and months , in a service where , if they told the truth , their master was openly , and almost unblushiiigly , carrying on an incestuous intercourse with his own daughter , that daughter being a married woman , and ' he himself a clergyman ! Could tlioy place any reliance upon the evidence of such persons ? Would any one having the least regard for
his credit or character have so acted , if what they stated had really occurred ? It was impossible , and he submitted to thejury that they ought not to p lace any reliance upon the evidence that had been given . It was difficult , nay , almost impossible to contradict evidence of the description that had been given , but in his opinion there was abundant ground for the jury to entertain suspicion of the whole case , and if this wore so , their only safe course was to acquit the accused . The learned seijeant concluded by expressing his opinion that tho case had not been made out , and he was satisfied thejury would find it impossible to return a verdict for the plaintiff . Lord Chief Justice Titukl summed up , anil the jury having deliberated for a short time , expressed a wish to retire , and were absent about half an hour , when they returned into court with a verdict for the plaintiff—Damages , £ 3000 .
Jwws'^'^Y"*^-*' •—¦"^^^ ' -V^-'Wv^^Wwiaa...
jwws' ^ ' ^ y" *^ - * ' •—¦ " ^^^ ' -v ^ - 'wv ^^ wwiAAA Hydrophobia . —On the 20 th of last month a young man , the son of a fisherman of the name of Avkden , residing in Barking-creek , whilst in a field in the rear of his father ' s house , was bitten in the leg by a puppy of the mastiff breed ; the lad took but little notice of the place , and a few days afterwards it healed up . On Thursday morning he for the first time complained of a pain iu the thigh , which increaseduntil it reached the right side , accompanied by vomiting to an extent that compelled him to go home , and he was put to bed . In ' the morning he complained of severe pains in the head , thirst , and a feeling as if being strangled . His parents sent for
Mi * . , Henderson , tho nearest medical practitioner , and in the interim the mother desired her son to wash his face , but upon bringing some wafer he exhibited the most intense agony , dashing it from him , and fainting . In that state he was found by Mr . Henderson , who immediately declared it to be a CISC of hydrophobia . The usual remedies were applied , but with little effect . At one time it required the united efforts of four men ( although he was but seventeen years of age ) to hold him down . He was finally fastened to the bed , and at his own request his eyes were covered , as even the shutting of a door , or the passage of any one across tlie room , creating the slightest air , affected hint in a most frightful manner . He expired on Sunday morning . —Globe .
Sisoulau Rktubs of Stolen Pnor-Ewn-. — Tho shop , of Mr . G . Davics , of Dolgcliy , in the county of Merioneth , was burglariously robbed , and a very large quantity of watches and jewellery stolen , on . the morning of the 4 th of January . In June last , a man named Jonathan Jones was apprehended as being one concerned in the robbery , and four of the watches were found hy Mr . Hill , the active superintendent of police at Chester , in a box belonging to the prisoner . Jones was tried at the last assizes and transported for fifteen years . Tho report of the trial appeared in the Times under the head of . " North Wales Circuit . " It was strongly suspected that a man residing at Chester , name ' d Philip Dixon , was an accomplice ( it was on his information Jones was apprehended ) , but no evidence could be adduced against him . On the movning of Saturday , the lGth inst ., a box arrived for Mr . Davics by the Chester carrier , which , on opening , ho was most agreeably
surprised to find filled with the proceeds of the robbcrv , there being ninety-six watches , and a-large quantity of rings , < tc—in fact-, all that he recollected to have lost , except the four watches above-mentioned . The bos was accompanied by a small brown paper parcel , in which was a letter directed to , Mr . Davics ( not signed , of course ) , which was written badly , and saving , that "her ben to return him his property . " All that ( he carrier knows is , that the box and parcel were brought to the waggon by a man , small in size and unknown tn him . 1 lie ailair , as Hm be imagined , lias caused a great stir m this quiet town , and all arc glad of the happy return , as Mr . Davics is a man much respected , and was very much sympathised with by every one . The " Dabk Aces . " - " The boy at the head of the class wi'l state what- were the dark ages ot the world . Boy hesitates . " Next—Master Jones , can ' t yon ten us-what the dark ages were ? " Boy— " 1 guess they wc * c the ages before spca-yxla were , invented . " " Go t o your seat . "
M Sits*
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Kxkieh Halt. Issoi.Vest.-Sir Culling Lia...
Kxkieh Halt . Issoi . vEST .-Sir Culling liardley Smith , John Dean l ' aul , and James Lord , icspcctivclv the chairman , treasurer , and secretary of a bud / which styles itself tlie Anti-Maynooth Committee , have * issued a circular , stating , that in their efforts to oppose the Maynooth Endowment Hill that Association has contracted dents to the amount . of £ 732 Ms . lid ., which it is unable to defray , and demanding assistance , in order to discharge ; '
tiiem . The Anti-afnynootli Committee hasmanifestly committed itself ; but how can people have the conscience to ask charity of others who have so littlo of it themselves ? In stirring up the fires of religiousanimosity , the Exetcr-Hallitcs have burnt their own fingers , and arc deservedly smarting in consequence . Let us hope that the biirnt children—for childish enough they are—will dread the fire . We shall not be sorry to sec an execution put into their hall , and their platform and other properties sold up . May no misplaced sympathy avert that most dcvoutly-to-ba wished consummation !—Punch .
, Public Safety . —Accidents are becoming so plentiful on the railways that we seriously propose that an Act of Parliament should bo passed next session , making it penal for any railway to start without one or more directors in each train . When their own lives arc in jeopardy , we arc sure the railway autocrats will see the necessity of the greatest caution being used by every one employed on the line , to guard the public against injury . —lbkl . Change i r Diet . —Wc sec Mr . Forbes Mackenzie was amongst the number of guests at the Ministerial white-bait dinner . Wchopc the hon . member was provided with something better than his own words to cat , for really nothing else seems to have passed . Mr . Mackenzie ' s lips since he has joined the mess of Ministers . —Md .
Bkqiji at Home . —John Adams , cx-pvesident of the United States , being called upon for a contribution for foreign missions , said , " 1 have nothing to give for that purpose ; but there arc here in this vicinity six ministers , not one of whom will preach in the other ' s pulpit . Now , I will give as much or more than any" one else to civilise these clergymen . " Proper Iscumv . —A lady reading that a man had been sentenced to six months' hard labour for dog . stealing , observed to- a friend , with a shudder , " Gracious ! my love , what would certain of our sex have to endure for entrapping puppies . ' "
blBuS OV A FlJATllER will FLOCK TOOETHBR . — -IlOCbiick recently declared in his place iu the House , that " perhaps with some half ~ doze >\ exceptions , the whole House were dabblers in railway shares . " Upon hearing this , Sibtiiorp threw a terrific somersault across the table , and pouncing upon the little M . P . for Bath , exclaimed , "I never thought it would come to this , but I must shake your hand , by G-d !" Each to ins Taste . —It was remarked at the Cabinet white-bait dinner that Bucelcuch ' s Duke stuck to that right royal fish the sturgeon , Peel to gudgeon , and Graham to plaice . The rest of the ministerial ^ snapped up all the loaves ami fishes that came te hand with every sign of an inordinate appetite .
A Fact . —Every little lad in Yorkshire knowssufficicnt of scripture history to he able to inform you who was saved when the world was drowned ; for if the question bo put to him , " My lad , can you tell me who built the ark ? " ho will answer " lVoa . " Speculation Extuaouoixaiiy . —The llcconlof Tuesday last contains an advertisement calling the attention of" Christian Capitalists to a scheme for the extension of Evangelical Truth , requiring an outlay of from £ 2000 to £ 5000 . and insuring ten or fifteen per cent , on the sum expended !" What , sett the truth !—we think we hear the din , And groan of Evangelical " 0 , fics - , " Why aell jour truth ? You'll make a heap of tin , With less hypocrisy , by soiling lies ! Oh ! why should you—with stock on hand to sell , 'fell truth so badly , who tell lies so well .
Joe MilUr . Names for Railway Tenders . —The " Smasher l " the " Crusher ! " the " Grinder ! " and the " In at-thc-Death . "—Ibid . A Reason * . —Why was the Squireen murdered in Tipperary ?—Bckasc he swore he'd be a white-boyf and he kept a Mack hog . '—Ibid . Tub Cut of the Faulk . —Why did the King of Bokhara persecute the Graver Missionary ?—Because he wentas a " Wolff" in sheep ' s clothing . —Ibid . Gkach and Disgrace . —What are the most disgraceful postures and positions?—Jiu-postures and tin-positions arc the most dw-gvaceful . —Ibid . BnoucnAM an * b Sor-nocuis . —Brougham called an Empress a Statesman—Sophocles , in his play-bill , has made one of his dramatis personce a blind Sea %
Cambridge Ca * svassino . — A Cambridge butcher being canvassed during the late contest for Mr . Adair , by one of that gentleman ' s friends , he pointed to a log of mutton hanging in the shop , and said , "That's a fine leg , sir . " " Yes , it is , " was the reply . *• It weighs IOlbs ., " added the man in blue , " and its price is £ 5 per pound . " " Then , " said the canvasser , " it will suit Mr . Kelly ' s party ' s appetite better than Mr . Adair ' s , " and left the shop . An Equwocm . Dvxt . \ wf . tM * s . —& . cleanly-shaved gentleman inquired of a fair damoiselle , the other day , " whether or no she admired moustachios ?" " O , " replied the charmer , with an arch look , " I invariably set my face against them . " Very shortly afterwards his upper lip betrayed symptoms of careful cultivation .
An Amkiucax Marvel . —The Eaton Pegistcrstates , on the authority of a Mr . Woodward , of Warren county , Ohio , " said to Ac a man of veracity , " that the citixens of Lebanon lately proceeded to disinter the body of a Mrs . Irwin , with a view to place it by the side of her husband ' s remains , and found it petrified ! To complete the phenomenon , they were all " petrified—with astonishment . " I ' aiudjse Reoainkd . —The Co * pci / 3 anwov ( American paper ) says that a schooner , built a short time since at Eden , Hancock county , Maine , is called " The Garden . " Of course she is the floating Garden of Eden , and so she is named upon her stern . Captain Adam W ilk ins is her master ; Abel Randall is mate ; anrt Mrs . At / dine Wilkins ( Captain Adam ' s wife ) is cook .
MoitE "Great Facts" for "Little Folks . —A . Yankee lad , whose father was a farmer , went into a barn to play a short time ago , and being detained a prisoner by a thunderstorm , he fell asleep upon a bag of guano . The old gentleman , when the storm was over , went into the farm-yard to look for his son , ami incta giant , eight feet high , coming out of the barn . "Ifaflo ' . who arc you ? " he cried ; " what are ' you doing here ? " " Why , father , " squeaked the Goliah , " it's mc ; don't you " know Tommy ? " " You ! " the astonished parent exclaimed ; " why , Tom , how on airtu did you get stretched out so long in so short a time ? " "Why , father , " replied tho boy , looking down upon the gaping old man , " I slept ; upon them bags of guano as you put in the barn , and that and . the lightning together just did the business !" A fair Tradeh . — A widow of the name of Rugghaving taken a Mr . Price for her second husband , and being asked by a friend how she liked the change , replied , "O , I have sold my old Rugg for a good Price . "
Goon for the Gander , Good for the Goose . — The ladies of Springfield . U . S ., are . organising an opposition to the Odd Fellows , under the title Of "The Independent Order of Strange Women !" Lucky Bon . — " Come , Bob , tell us how much you have cleared by your speculation ? " said Bob ' s quizzical friend to ' him the other day . " Cleared I" replied Bob , with a frown , " why , you fool , I ' ve cleared my pockets . " Eviispjsakixc and BACKumM ! . — Much inquiry having been made concerning a gentleman who hail quitted a company where Dr . Johnson was , and no information being obtained , at last Johnson said , " 1 don't like to speak ill of any man behind his back , but 1 believe the gentleman is an « ttor » e «" Candid Acknowledgment , — Amongst the advertisements in a late London paper , we read that * ' Two sisters ivant washing ; " and that a spinster , particularly fond of children , wishes for two or three , or any other cmplovment !
"Tub likeliest of the- two . "—Lord Brougham once said he hoped to sec the day when every poor man would be able to read and understand Bacon . Cobbett said it would bo much more to the purpose if he could devise the means of enabling them to eat bacon . , Beating the Mail . —An Iowa editor acknowledges tlie receipt , of congressional documents "in advance of the mail , " in consequence of a flock of wolves and an old she bear chasing the post rider across the prairies !
Mesmeric Honours where they are not Wanted . —The following letter lately appeared in the Times , from the Librarian of the Athcmvum Club , who happens to , bear the same name as the Lecturer on Mesmerism -. —Sir , May I trespass upon your kindnvs 3 for the insertion of this letter ? It is my last hope , my last chance of relief from sufferings caused by the reputation of another . You may remember , that in November last . Miss Martineau stated she had been restored to health by mesmerism anil Mr . Spencer iiail . Lectures in thai name were subsequently advertised in your paper , and the lecture )* was in requisition . Unfortunately the public selected me to be tho man . 1 denied it , —in vain : 1 am still
doomed to the inconvenience of that most mistaken conviction . 1 have borne wit , that has sorely tried tho charity ' - which enjoins you to consider your friends " wit no evil . I have suffered for opinions to an extent that should earn mc a wood-cut and chapter in a book of martyrs . I have received visits with the courtesy of the afflicted , and the resignation of him that hath no helper , lint I am not the lecturer , and the wit wearies , the visits interfere with my duties , and the opinions oppress like opiates . I know nothing of mesmerism , except that it induces sleep . I trust , after this denial , 1 may be allowed to exist in quiet . —1 have the honour to be , sir , your obedient servant , Si'esceu Hall , Librarian .
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Citation
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Northern Star (1837-1852), Aug. 23, 1845, page 3, in the Nineteenth-Century Serials Edition (2008; 2018) ncse.ac.uk/periodicals/ns/issues/ns2_23081845/page/3/
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