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Tomahawk (1867-1870), 11th April 1868, Edition 1 of 1, Page 151, In the name of all that is Christian, wh...

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  • Departments (4)
    • WHICH IS WHICH, AND WHAT IS WHAT?
    • STAGE AND STATS.
    • PLEASING !
    • A CASE FOR THE LASH.
  • Text (9)
  • Transcript

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      April 11, 1868.] . The Tomahawk. 151

      April 11 , 1868 . ] . THE TOMAHAWK . 151

      Which Is Which, And What Is What?

      WHICH IS WHICH , AND WHAT IS WHAT ?

      By A Poor Old Puzzle-Head. Fact I . Conf...

      BY A POOR OLD PUZZLE-HEAD . fact I . CONFESS I am an I am old not puzzle very -head brig . ht . I read I am the behind newspapers the age and , in I try to understand them ; I study the questions of the , day , and Vtry to find answers to them ; but I never get any further than' a state of hopeless inceititude , which seems to me worse than my original state of ignorance . I am full of admiration and respect , and worship , but cannot make up my mind on whom to bestow them . I don ' t like the Tories . I dislike the Whigs . I never could understand what Liberal meant , except at a contested election . Conservatives always suggest to me preserved meats in a tin case , hermetically sealed and not worth the names unsealing I generall . As y feel for first the as Radicals if I rather , at liked the mention them , they of seem their to suggest innocent vegetables , but my next impression is that they are predatory animals ; and I feel my pockets to see if they have not divided my substance among themselves . Really all this is very humiliating to one ' s self-respect ; it shows great weakness in my character . I know very well that there are witty plenty , eloquent of upright arid , spotless above all statesmen thoroughl and y sincere politicians and honest ; wise . , But hardly do I think , that I have , found one before whom I can fall down and worship , then whisk ! round he turns , and I see that the angel ' s wings served only to hide the devil's horns . After all , this is the result of my reading the papers . I wish I could make up my mind about somebody or something . There is Mr . Disraeli , for instance . He seems made to be worshipped , he is so successful . I thought last year he had done so much good ; he had carried with great patience and perseverance a wonderful measure of Reform , much more liberal than that proposed by the Liberals ; he had done this in the face of abuse and frequent humiliations . . A great source of agitation was at length dried up , and there seemed some hope that what them the peop at last le ( as , with I was simp told le ) if had not been compound asking interest for , had . been But I given find

      1 was quite mistaken ; I hnd that Mr . Disraeli has been guilty of every crime that a minister and a man can commit ; I find that this was nothing but trickery and treachery , and fraud , and self-seeking , and greed of place ; that he has been false to himself , false to his colleagues , false to his country ; that he is several a charlatan other , actionable a mountebank terms , . a Good trickster -b , a Mr . Disraeli , a I , must and not worship you : you have changed your ye opinionsand , sacrificed your principles . Away with you ! Then I fixed , on Mr . Gladstone . I was delighted to find that he was everything that was if any good body and eve beautiful r was— , sincerity and noble itself and ; true the . most He was large honest -hearted — statesman of the age . Very well ; I got my cushion ready , and unemp fitted up loyed the stores shrine of : respect to Mr . and Gladstone devotion , said . But I , will first I let proffer me study my the history of such a miracle of virtue and honour . So I read up the history of Gladstone , and I found that the men who now loaded him with praise had , not many years ago , covered him wi cess th of obloquy conviction . . I found all his life t , he and had that been though going he throug migh h t be a con pro- - victed , he never seemed convinced . I found that he had once been , and that not lightly—or in the unsettled ardour of youth — destroy the sworn . I found supporter that by a cu everything rious coincidence which he he had onl sought y begun to to those advocate reforms the were reforms supported which by a maj had ority helped either to in carry or , about when every to be in movement , office . I exactly found at that the he time had always when success been in w , the as about of hop to crown ing for the it . efforts I found , of others , in fact who , that had though long been every looking change and of opinion no doubt had caused him much reflectionit had cost him nothing else . This was the result of my study , of the history of Mr . Gladstone . I took up the cushion and closed , the shrine . I tried Lord John R—I beg his pardon — through Earl Russell the wrong , but end he alway of a telescope seemed to ; as me a like misanthr a hero op seen ical been washerwoman perfect j with but as a talent a demi for -god writing he w letters as more , he of would the demi have believe than the he god was . Then an honest there wa man s J ohn till , Brig I read ht . some Well , confoundea I did really articles about him in the newspapers , which told me what a

      mischievous try trying to agitator inflame the he was peop , and le against how he those went who about were the better counoff by a than cotton them mill . I or found a carpet that a m man anufactory who made , was an , £ 20 angel , 000 , a whilst -year Liberal a Lord man Cranbourne who press made declare , , , £ again 5 , d 000 he . a was -year When a shallow out he but of came land , captious was into censor a , office se fiend lf of -sufficient . , the all Then vil the - lanies talker ; of now the he colleagues is a deep whom , severe he , has just abandoned . It is always the same tale : I have no sooner learnt to admire , than I am forced to despise ; I have no sooner been taught to hate , than I am entreated to love . I should like a simple guide to the principles of truth , honour my mind , and is not integrity capable , in of Statesmen making and itsel other f up , public when characters it has to , unmake one side itself to the so other soon with . At a present smile or , I a am frown turning as the my voice head of from the Press whispers in my ear . It is very wearying , but it seems likely to go on for ever .

      Stage And Stats.

      STAGE AND STATS .

      H.R.H. The Prince Of Wales Is To Be Inve...

      H . R . H . the Prince of Wales is to be invested with the order of St . Patrick . This is all very well , but too much importance must not be attached to the event . Just nowperhaps , bear it might in be mind wise that to take the mere a hint issuing from theatrical of orders managers is no , sign , and of success .

      Pleasing !

      PLEASING !

      Here Is A Fact, Complete In Itself, Requ...

      Here is a fact , complete in itself , requiring neither explanation the , wives comment of soldiers , nor deduction have been . A allowed certain to number of women their , husbands to Abyssinia , . A few married women accompany are always useful and necessary to a regiment proceeding on foreign service , and the regulations grant them an allowance and rations while so attached . A return has recently been called for of all casualties that have occurred in the Abyssinian regiments with the sole view of ascertaining if any of the soldiers , whose wives are with them , are dead , in order that the allowances and rations of the women may , according to the regulahusbands tions , be withdrawn . The fact from , pure the and dates simp of le death , speak of s their for itself respective —and for the War Office .

      A Case For The Lash.

      A CASE FOR THE LASH .

      In The Name Of All That Is Christian, Wh...

      In the name of all that is Christian , what ought to be done to the set of British gentlemen who are responsible for the scandalously cruel line of conduct that has been pursued keep towards itself our w troops ithin co in urteous the Mauritius limits when ? Indi one gnation reads the . can w scarcel retched stereotyped " explanation " given to the House of Commons by Mr . Adderley on the off-day . last week . To recapitulate the details here would be superfluous , for lengthy reports in every English newspaper have by this time pretty well awakened the country to the nature of the outrage that has been perpetrated on the helpless sufferers at Port St . Louis . " Everything had been done that could be done in such a case " morally whines out the Government representative . " Nonsense , " Mr . Adderley—and something much worse than nonsense—that is the proper reply to such a miserable " mea culfia " as is yours . Talk of schemes for recruiting , suggest methods or increasing the effective strength of our army I Why this business at Mauritius will undo the work of twenty commissions , and a good thing too . In private life , if a woman beats a child , more—if she neglects it , or places it in circumstances calculated her to endanger , and she its meets safety the or charge its life as , forthwith a criminal the . law In is public down ques upon - tions all this is reversed . Here a body of helpless men are literally thrust into the very jaws of death , deliberately too and witting is met l b y , and the when usual popular official indignation shufflethat is considers aroused , it the the matter first imperial y duty to smother a scandal , and holds to the creed that routine " can do no wrong . " We , insist that Mr . Adderlev ' s

  • Citation
    • Tomahawk (1867-1870), April 11, 1868, page 151, in the Nineteenth-Century Serials Edition (2008; 2018) ncse.ac.uk/periodicals/t/issues/ttw_11041868/page/9/