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  Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software. The text has not been manually corrected and should not be relied on to be an accurate representation of the item.

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    September 28, 1867.] THE TOMAHAWK. 215

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    SOMETHING LIKE ADMINISTRATION.

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    It is satisfactory to know that the War ...

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    RIGHT ROYAL ENTERTAINMENT.

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    The Queen of Holland arrived at Woolwich...

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    the Evident Queen's. .— This The is New ...

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    tion "Music of a " barrel hath organ Cha...

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    A SNOB ABROAD TO SNOBS AT HOME.

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    What, haven't you been to Pary ? By Jove...

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    THE GOOD TIME COMING.

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    We learn with infinite joy that Mr. Beal...

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    "Naif Enfant!"—A Guardsman we know assur...

• Transcript

  • Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software. The text has not been manually corrected and should not be relied on to be an accurate representation of the item.

    Additionally, when viewing full transcripts, extracted text may not be in the same order as the original document.

    No. 3.—The Inquisitive Neighbour. Those ...

    has seen , & c , & c . " You may defeat his curiosity , but you cannot check his malice . than There mischievous is , I doubt but not I cannot , a sort hold of curiosity that such which impertinent is more inquiry ridiculous into one creature ' s doings is as is great a , thing as his to mendacity be laughed ; at he . would The shamelessness stop an archangel of this , if he met one in the streetand ask leave to measure his wings . He is

    i proof treat r » - « ¦ ¦ w him m to ^ ^ all ^ f is ^ A ^^ with insults *^^ ^ aa contempt » fc * , "r f for ^ ^ ^^ ^* he ™ , j b . has bj- ¦ " ^^ It no ^ p ^ is r *^ — honour ^ a - p » ity " - ^ that ^ to — -- insul the — — police t , and — ' cannot the onl ^ j y interfere way to with such fellows , or that they cannot be used as spies or detectives to some Of the good harm purpose that . this noxious creature does , I may say somewhat . It is not that he causes constant irritation and annoyances to those whom he honotirs with his attentionbut his unscrupulous lying inflicts

    too often a woundwhich like that of , a fly which , has fed on carrion , is , incurable more portion contemptible to , for his men greatness err the much instnim , for who ent its suppose , often the more that just serious a contrar man's is power iwise the hurt ; is and . in This pro the - vice will , not of which say whose I have sex spoken —preserves , is mostl them y from practised personal by those chastisement whose age , so I ¦ that one is almost defenceless . Some would say ** Have ~~~ no secrets

    ^^ j ^ ^^^ ^^ ^^^ F ^ B . ^ L ^^ p . ~^\ r f ^^^ v . vn *• ^ p > ^^^ ^^^ ^ b > ^ " ™ ^ B ^ ^ fc ^ a ^ ^ Bt « Bt ^ B ^ ^^ r ^ h 'Bj ^ ^ # - ^| r v v ^ h ^ ^^ ^» ^ fc ** ^^^ * v ^^ ™ ^™ * ww ¦ — — ^ w , ^ m ^ ~ — ^ ~~ — — , ^^ and you need fear ** no inquisition * m . B > ; " «* B . but ] . besides < V *^ that . ^ a , no one cares to ¦ have all their private affairs babbled about by unfeeling praters , it is not necessary to have anything to conceal for him to discover it . As I have said his invention keeps pace with his malice , which increases as he is disappointed in the gratification of his consuming passionso that those

    who are most innocent of harm generally find themselves , the subject of the most horrible stories , and nothing is'harder than to fix the original guilt of such inventions on their inventor , for the stream of gossip ever rises in a foul source and flows through a muddy channel , and it gathers dirt and darkness as it runs along . And here I may plead guilty to

    having treated of gossiping as well as of inqviisitiveness , but I cannot separate the two , for they are like the Siamese twins , and cannot live asunder . Think not then that curiosity is harmless , but be on your guard against such persons , and when you choose a house , see first , if possible , that you have not an Inquisitive Neighbour .

    September 28, 1867.] The Tomahawk. 215

    September 28 , 1867 . ] THE TOMAHAWK . 215

    Something Like Administration.

    SOMETHING LIKE ADMINISTRATION .

    It Is Satisfactory To Know That The War ...

    It is satisfactory to know that the War Office has neglected no means of rendering the Abyssinian Expedition complete . In the first instance , it was thought probable that there would be great difficulty in procuring mules , and it was immediately decided that a body of officers should be sent to — the _ _ princi j pal ports of the Mediterranean — to buy as many

    animals as mig ht be required . t . It has since transp ' , ired that J , carrying mules to Abyssinia , is very like taking coals to Newcastle , and that serviceable beasts are to be had at a nominal price in the very district in which the Expedition will land , where the native chiefs are all more or less at war with the Emperor — Theodore - ^ and - _ are _ quite _ - read __ y to _ sell vis

    cheap , for there will — — be competition - __ , as , many beasts _^ — as we can j possibl ^ — y want . The action of the authorities has been decisive . There are twelve officers , each accompanied by a veterinary surgeon and a commissariat official ( at three guineas a-day all round ) , already on the Mediterranean . One has been recalled ! Captain Hobart , of the

    Artillery , who is now on his way to Smyrna , will , on arrival at his destination , fiiid awaiting him the order for his immediate return . No decision has yet been arrived at regarding the remaining three- ? . ndthirty officers , but there is little doubt that sooner or later , the same energetic course will be adopted in every instance .

    Right Royal Entertainment.

    RIGHT ROYAL ENTERTAINMENT .

    The Queen Of Holland Arrived At Woolwich...

    The Queen of Holland arrived at Woolwich one day last week on a visit to this country . On landing from her yacht Her Majesty was received by a staff of Custom-house officials , and after a slight detention drove from the pier in Mr . Claridge's carriage to that hospitable gentleman the gaiety ' s residence of the in present Brook season street . has The since Queen quitted , weary town , we and presume is now , the of

    guest of Lord Salisbury , at , Hatfeld House . On , leaving Lord not Salisbury improbable ' s Her that Majesty she ' will s movements return to are Rotterdam at present . uncertain Who can , say but that it is we among do u s ? know how to entertain foreign royalty when it comes

    The Evident Queen's. .— This The Is New ...

    the Evident Queen's . . — This The is New happy Theatre , as her ( old Majesty St . Martin is sure ' s Hall to direct ) is to that be called a box be taken in her name .

    Tion "Music Of A " Barrel Hath Organ Cha...

    tion "Music of a " barrel hath organ Charms " to , " the & c Emperor . —It appears Theodore now was that the the real presenta cause - gin of the to an Ab xuulertaking yssinian difficulty that promises . This is to , at become all events famous , an for appropriate its " stops ori . "

    A Snob Abroad To Snobs At Home.

    A SNOB ABROAD TO SNOBS AT HOME .

    What, Haven't You Been To Pary ? By Jove...

    What , haven ' t you been to Pary ? By Jove , Sir , everyone has been to JPary . Why , I even saw old Starchem of the Decimal Compound Office over there the other day , and a precious fine specimen of an fifty Englishman bob there he and looked back , I first can class tell you . First . As class to the think damage of that , why with , it ' s cushions and all the rest , of it ! Think of being able , to swagger , like a

    Pary lord for has fifty the bob pull , of and Cremorne nobody being altogether a bit the . T wiser / iere ! you As must to dress get your , Sir - , you self up wouldn with ' t a be bit an of Eng a flower lishman in if your you didn button ' t sport -hole , a but roug at h shag Pary , — wid wh e y - i i end awak of e , them and , short and what clay ! they Streets call — their of cours fashions e there , but are you ; meet and shops nothing , — but no j i couldn a set of ' t dirty give you Mossoos "Slap , who Bci , I 7 ' ig ll " bet for a the fiver life , never of ' em heard . Their of H cafy yams ' s , ain and ' t I bad in their waybut you must take care to show them when in

    , you go that you don ' t intend to be humbugged , —so don ' t take off your hat to the woman stuck up behind the bottles and sugar-pots . It ' s only dirty been Frenchmen brought who up like do a this set , of because snobs . they Mind don , ' too t know , you ask better for , Bass and have and if Sir — the , sticking — — fools - - -m ~ — — ^ don ^^ in — ^^^ ' t a « - understand " garcong «^ w ¦ - - -v w w —'¦ ^^ w " you ^ here ^ — — , ¦ - ^ -- swear and w w — — there ^ ^ at ^ ^^^ them ^^ to «* ^^ - ^ show ^ in ««• ^ - ^ good v you w ^^ ^^ round can ^ t ^ m * 4 m ^ m talk mj n Eng ^ v ^^ b their ^ lish 4 ^^^ Jfcfc ,

    beastly French as well as they can , if you choose to do it . As to their theatres , you'll hear nothing but their stupid jargon , though a thing they call the Duchess wouldn ' t be bad if it was done into a Christian tongue ever yovi , but go , mind mind you an Eng it doesn lishman 't touch ' s full . Utink dress y is dorum tweeds . However ; make , yourself whereat home just as if you were at Margatenot barring the shrimps if

    can get ' em . , you When you go to the In-validcs ( a sort of third-rate Chelsea Hospital ) , mind you touch up some of the old fellows with one leg , about Waterloo , and ask them how many Frenchmen it would take to thrash , half an Englishman . Its good fun to see how this makes the old fools

    wince , besides reminding them of what John Bull can do , and obliging them to respect him for it , as they ought . If you go in for sights , you'd better do the Louver—if it's only to say you ' ve been there , and tell them what a slow place you think it ; but out and out , the best thing in Pary is Mabile . That ' s the placeSirwhere true Britonslike

    you and me , feel thoroughly at home ;— , by , Jove , Sir , yes ! If , you should happen to do a church or two , never mind the people kneeling all over the place , but go about boldly , just where you like , and look at what you like , as an Englishman ought , if its only to show these . dirty foreigners what rot he thinks their mummeries . As to the

    ExposisAong , you can soon let them see what you think of that , by telling them how Hyde Pai'k was worth six of it , and how the best thing they ' ve got to show , after all , is the English gals and beer . In fact , as long as you are in Paryy keep up your British character , for its this sort of thing that gets England respected all over the Continent . I

    did ' nt know those fellows who had that spree with the statue the other day , but I wish I had been with them ; they must have been a rare set of fellows , and we should have got on no end together—yes , by Jove , that ' s the way to show these dirty Frenchmen what good plain English means , and the sooner .- _ __ - they j know _ it _ - by heart - -. the - better _ _ . _ . . But _ _ Pary _ ^ is

    the place to teach them all about it , so mind you come . Mind , only fifty bob—first class—cushions and all , and bless you , Sir , don ' t get shy off the Ru dc Riveli ;—you'll be far more at home there than you are in Pentonville —I am , and I can tell you , isn ' t it jolly , rather , as you go along the Bulevards in your billy-cock , to see everybody staring at you , and fancy ' em saying ** there goes a real live English gentleman 1 "

    The Good Time Coming.

    THE GOOD TIME COMING .

    We Learn With Infinite Joy That Mr. Beal...

    We learn with infinite joy that Mr . Beales is going to stand for Lambeth , Mr . George Potter for Marylebone , Mr . Baxter Langley for Greenwich , Colonel Dickson for Westminster , and Mr . Bi-acllaugh for the Tower Hamlets at the next election . They will be supported by all the strength -- of the Reform __ . League m - and - - - Working Men ' s Societies .

    - - — — _ — — j ^ bj | — — — — — ^ -p We wish them success . But would it not be better that their friends in Parliament ( Messrs . Mill , tlughes , Peter Taylor , Forster , Whalley , Gladstone , & c . ) should attempt ( in anticipation of the honour about to be conferred on the House of Commons ) to procure some reform in the usual etiquette of the House ? Might we suggest a more exact

    definition of *• Parliamentary language ? " Would it not be as well that a laug pulp h it , , who or something never speaks like it , should he blasphemes be erected ? We for the should benefit like of to B hear radthat elegant and refined gentleman on a Wednesday in a " religious " debate . Should these " chosen ones of the people" be elected , the American Congress will no longer blush to compare itself with the Parliament of the old mother country .

    "Naif Enfant!"—A Guardsman We Know Assur...

    " Naif Enfant ! " —A Guardsman we know assures us that Natator , the Cremorne Frog , seems quite out of water when he is on dry land .

• Citation
  • Tomahawk (1867-1870), Sept. 28, 1867, page 215, in the Nineteenth-Century Serials Edition (2008; 2018) ncse.ac.uk/periodicals/t/issues/ttw_28091867/page/3/