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    October 30, 1869] THE TOMAHA WK. r 305

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    THE JVATTOJST.

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    &,o. M.—£&t. P ulp, fyt doctor. xi r. Mr...

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  • Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software. The text has not been manually corrected and should not be relied on to be an accurate representation of the item.

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    October 30, 1869] The Tomaha Wk. R 305

    October 30 , 1869 ] THE TOMAHA WK . r 305

    The Jvattojst.

    THE JVATTOJST .

    &,O. M.—£&T. P Ulp, Fyt Doctor. Xi R. Mr...

    & , o . M . — £ & t . P ulp , fyt doctor . xi r . Mr . Tackler ' s establishment was certainly a peculiar one . was The startled day after by Mr a . series Pulp ' of s arrival violent , and single at knocks very earl at y the morn street , he - door and , the followed niht by bell equall indiscriminatel y violent ringing . After both the of the knocks door had bell apparently g accumulated to some thirty y , the street-door had ceeding evidently upstairs been opened from the , and voice then of a Mr shrill . Tackler shriek ' s was female heard servant proof " Paupers / " To Mr . Pulp ' s ear it sounded like the newspaper boy at the railway station ; but in reality it was the announcement to Mr . Tackier that paupers were arriving and taking up their station in the waiting-room to be treated . Tackler's female answering servant a knock never at the , under street- any door circumstances until it had been , thought repeated of would some twenty argue to or herself thirty times ; " master . " They ' s not piles up , and up at what the ' s door the use , " she of letting them in one by one ? Better wait and let ' em in by batches . " The window in Mr . Pulp ' s room , looked out upon the street , and Mr . Pulp , as he was dressing , contemplated the external arrangements . The paupers seemed to be arriving in small armies . bell through Directl violentl y the an y individual throng , and then , delivered reached calmly one and Mr furious . quietly Tackler sing took ' s le door up knock , his he , station strugg rang the led in the crowd as if he were waiting to be admitted to a gratis performance at a theatre . When the pavement was sufficiently blockaded street-door that was all thrown passage violentl by y pedestrian openand s the was multitude impossible surged , the Tackler into Mr ' . s Tackler servant ' s of dwelling il Paupe , rs and / " then Mr , , . arose Pulp had the onl cry y from just com Mr - . pleted his toilet , and had opened his door preparing to descend , when and Mr Mr . . Tackier Tackler ' s presented bedroom himself door was . He thrown was in violentl a state y of open de- , unbrushed shabille , and he he had was no looking cravat wild and he and wore haggard a pair . His of very hair loose was slipp " They ers , which ' re , at dropped it , Mr . Pul from p , ! his " he feet cried at every , in accent second s step of agony . . " They ' re at it ! They ' ve begun early this morning because they know I wanted a little extra sleep , having been up half the night . Hark at 'em ! they ' re coughing now . They know I hate h coug ave hing my br ; but eakfast I . def Come y them along , Mr . Pu ! " lp , I defy them , and I will Directl Mr . y Tackier they reached rushed the downstairs hallthe , followed scene that by Mr presented . Pulp . paupers itself was jammed something together surprising old and . , There young was , men a perfect and women crowd and of all supposed to be suffering , from some terrific malady . There , was no room for any more to enter unless they invaded Mr . Tackler ' s private rooms and mounted his staircase . Directly the paupers caught sight of the Doctor there was a perfect chorus of coughs and groans . They held out their bottles to him—for each pauper carried a bottle—and each one appealed to him to be treated first , and there was a general cry of " Give us physic !" this " Silence way . You ! " roared shall wait Mr . till Tackier I have . had " I my won breakfast ' t be badgered . I won in ' t be driven to my grave without a struggle . " Mrs " That . Tackier ' s rig , ht emer , George ging , fro that m ' the s rig dining ht ! " -room screamed . She the was voice a tall of , an a long gular white -looking dressing woman -gown , with , and her hair altogether in . papers presenting , and habited the ap in - pearance of a violoncello in a canvas covering . " That ' s right ; don Thus 't be enjoined put down , Mr . " . Tackier rushed into the breakfast-room followed by Mr . Pulp . Mrs . Tackier soon prepared the meal , which consisted of hot coffee and cold sausages . Mr . Tackier , sat down and eat like a wolf ; but between every mouthful he b took y a , variety there came of groans aloud , coughs single knock , and impatient at the street exclamations door , followed from the paupers outside . out before Go it ! the go it time J " cried I can t Mr ell . Tackier . You . m " You ruin won me 't bring ma me ? youay , you y knock starve up me . my " practice , you may drive me mad , but you shan't

    Mr . Tackier went on eating furiously , murmuring his indignation at intervals . The way he peeled the sausages before he ^ coffee devoure and d them the , the method manner in he which ht he at gul the ped bread down and the butter hot with his , teeth like savage a savage dog , and caug bit out large semicircles , all showed the fury and desperation of his excited mind . At last he threw down his knife and fork , and nearly drove his plate from him off the table and exclaimed" Do you hear that , Mr . Pulp ? " ci That What ? coug " said h ! Mr That . Pul ' s p . Sibley . I know him . He comes hate here the the first sound , and . There he hacks ' s nothing , and the hacks matter , because with him he , but knows he is I greed And then y for he his added physic , turning , and he to knows his wife that , "Is will the bring tub read me y % out " . " " " The Yes , " tub said ! " Mrs said . Tackier Mr . Pul . p . « What's the tub ? " You " The will tub have , " the said kindness Mr . Tackier this , morning " is my to method take charge of treatment of it . " . " But what is it ? " said Mr . Pulp . " You don't treat them hydropathically , do you ? " Mr . Tackier laughed , and so did Mrs . Tackier . morning " No , my . It dear is saline Sir , but draug I have htan one admirable tub of ph medicine ysic made . It every saves a world of trouble . You merel , y turn the cock and fill the bottle , and colour the contents with anything you like . It cures all maladies . The tub is in the Surgery , and now as that villain Sibley is at it again , let us go and see the patients . " Mr . Tackier the assembled started up , opened like a the cannon door , ball and . dashed Mr . Pul in among paupers p followed him . " Who ' s the first ? " shouted Mr . Tackier ; and a chorus Mr . Tackier of voices . His rep method lied to the of treatment question , which was sh further arp and infu peculiar riated . He rushed among the paupers ; he singled out one , and furiously demanded of the unfortunate , What ' was s symptom the matter s and with pains him was ? cut The short descri by ption a demand for him to put out his tongue . That was enough . The next question was , " Where ' s your bottle ? " and when this was produced , it was handed to Mr . Pulp , who rushed down stairs for into an the enormous Surgery stone to fill tub it . stood This upon was a the very Surgery simple counter transaction and , by turning on the tap the physic was made , and handed to the , pauper case , who of disease was then among dismissed Mr . Tackler . Th ' s ere paupers was , apparentl ; but they y were , every all treated upon the same rapid and expeditious principle . Mr . Tackier was one of those doctors who are so difficult to convince of the existence of disease at all in pauper patients . Half of the maladies were described by him as " rubbish , all fancy , shamming , humbug , nothing the matter ! " but still he gave them the physic . Still the tap of the tub was kept hard at work ; and Mr . Pulp was quite exhausted with the exertion and excitement of running up and down stairs and filling the bottles . " Where ' s Sibley ? " cried Mr . Tackier , as the paupers began to thin off . " Here I am , Sir , " said an old man , giving a grand cough as he presented himself . " I can wait . " " I've no doubt you can , rny man ; but I ' m not going to stand it , " said Mr . Tackier . " No better , of * course ?" gets " No wors t a e bit every , " said day . Mr That . Sibley physic . " don Not ' t agree a hatom with . me In , fact I can , I tell you . It ain't half strong enough . It don ' t do me no good whatever . " him " You the ' re usual an old . He impostor 'll get , " nothing shouted else Mr . from Tackier me . . " I Pulp know , gi his ve case . " took " Very worse wel , and l , " I said know Mr I . shal Sibley l be . , I " 'll Then comp m lain ark to me the , if Board I am , who that ' s I took will . worse I'll have can't you be treated up . It properl 's very y , hard and hav as e his poor pro per p you hy ' sic ve . given There him ' s . no old end Winsor of nasty , he ain physiq 't half , and so put bad a seton as me in , and his neck , and lots of leeches all over his body . It ' s favouring , that ' s what it is , and it ' s a shame . Yah !" porting "Yah old ! " groaned Sibley in about his denunciation a dozen sympathizing . paupers , sup" Look here ! " cried Mr . Tackier , " seizing an empty quart bottle by the neck , which he was about to hand to Mr . Pulp"look here ! I'll have no riot here . You may complain where

• Citation
  • Tomahawk (1867-1870), Oct. 30, 1869, page 205, in the Nineteenth-Century Serials Edition (2008; 2018) ncse.ac.uk/periodicals/t/issues/ttw_30101869/page/9/