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BEAUTIES OF BYItON. KO. Til. ** BXfiLISH...
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*"I knew thelate Lord Falkland well. On ...
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COMMON SENSE, Addressed tome IxiunrmTs o...
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PUNCH—PabtXLIX. London: Punch Office, 02...
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A BOWL OF "PUA'CU." FRESH BREWED.
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TlIK DUEE AKD THE RATCATCHER.— Tlie Dltk...
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MONSTROUS CASE OF CRIM. CON. CROYDON, Au...
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Hydrophobia.—On the 20th of last month a...
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Exktbb Hall Jxm.VKST.Sir Culling Eardlcy...
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Beauties Of Byiton. Ko. Til. ** Bxfilish...
BEAUTIES OF _BYItON . KO . Til . ** BXfiLISH BARBS A . _VD SCOTCH RE VIEWEBS . " In the following lines thc poet lashes the fashion able and vicious of his own " order : *'There the hired eunuch , the Hesperian choir , ' The melting lute , the soft _lascivious lyre , The sod . ? from Italy , thc step from France , The midnight orgy , and thc mazy dance , The smile of heauty , and the Hash of wine , For fops , fouls , gamesters , knaves , and lords combine : Each to his humour— Comus all allows ; Champagne , dice , music , or your neighbour ' s spouse . Talk not to us , ye starving sons of trade ! Of piteous ruin , which ourselves have made ; In Plenty ' s suu _? h : ne Fortuue ' s minions bash ,
Xor think of poverty , except " en masque , " "When for tlie _nijjht some lately titled ass Appears the beggar , which his _grandsire was . The cuvtiin dropp'd , thc gay burlctta o ' er , The audience lake their turn upou the floor ; Sow round the room the circling don ' gets sweep , _Sow in loose waltz tbe thin-clad daughters leap ; Tlie first iu _leagtheu'd line majestic swim , The last _di-play the free unfetter'd limb ! Tliose for llibernia ' s lusty sans r . pair "With art tbe charms which nature could not spare ; "These _aftt-r hushjnds wing their eager flight , _3 f or leave much mystery for thu nuptial night . Oh ! blest retreats of infamy and ease , "Where , all forgotten but tbe power to please , -Each maM mav give a loose to genial though ; ,
-JEach swain may teach new systems , cr be taught : There the _blitheyoungsti-r , just return'd from Spain , -Cuts the light pack , or calls ilie rattling main ; The jorial caster ' s set , and seven's the nick , Or—dune!—a thou-and on the coming trick ! If mad with loss , existence ' gins to tire , Aud ail your hope or wish is to expire _. Here ' s Powell ' s pistol ready for your life , And , kiailcr still , two 1 ' agcts for vour wife ; . sit co : if uin : ! iatioii of au earthly race , _lh-gun ill folly , ended in _disgrac .- ; While none but menials o ' er the bed of death , _IVash tliy red wounds , or watch thy wavering breath ; Traduced by liars , and forgot by all , The _mangled viciim ofa _drui _. lcen _ln-awl _. To live like Clodius , and like Falkland fall . *
Truth ! rouse some _genuine bard , and guide his hand , To drive this pestilence from out the land ! X ' eu 1—least thinking of a thoughtless throng , Just skill'd to know die rigiit and chooso the wrong , JFr « _.-eVI at that ag _* when reason ' s shield is lost , To fight my coarse _throujli passion ' s countless host , _f Whom every path of pi : asurc ' s flowery way lias lurc-1 in tain , and all have led astray . ¦ E ' en I must raise mj voic _** , e ' en 1 must feel Such _icenes , such men , destroy the public weal ; Although some kind , censorious friend will say , « ' What _sirt thou better , meddimg l ' ool , J than they !" And every brother rake will smile to see That mira ' - _'le , a moralist in me . With thc following lines—the conclusion of the poem—we close our _extracts from English Bards and Scotch _ICcaiciccrs : —
Thus far I ' ve tvld my _unilisturb'd career , _TKpared for rancour , stcei'd ' gainst selfish fear : This thing of rhyme I nt * r disdain'd to own , Though not obtrusive , yet not quite unknown : JJIy voice was heard again , though not so loud , 3 Iy page , though nameless , neTer disavow _ed ; And now at once I tear tha veil away I Cheer on the park ; tbe quarry stands at bay , Unsearcd by all the din of Melbourne House , By _Lambda resentment , or hy Holland ' s spouse , By Jeffrey _» harmless pistol , Ilallam ' s rage , _JEdina ' _j _1 > i 3-. tjij « hjs slid _brinstoue page . Our men in buckram shall have blows enough , And feel they too " are penetrable stuff : " And though I hops not thence unscathed to go , "Who conquers me shall find a stubborn foe . The time bath been , wb : n no harsh sound would fall
Prom lips that now inay seem imbued witli gall ; Jfor fools nor follies tempt me to despise The meanest thing that _crawl'd beneath my eyes : But now , so callous grown , so changed since youth , I ' ve learn'd to think , and sternly speak the truth ; leara'd to derMe the critic ' s starch decree , And break lim on tlie wheel he meant for me ; To spurn tbe rod a scribbler bids ine kiss , Jfor care if courts and crowds applaud or hiss : Say , more , though all my rival rhymesters frown , I , too , can hunt a poetaster down ; Ami , arm'd in proof , tlie gauntlet cast at once To Scotch marauder and to southern dunce . Thus inneli I've dared ; if my incondite lay Hath _wrong'd these righteous times , let others say : This , let tlie world , which knows not how to spare , Yet rarely blames unjustly , now declare .
*"I Knew Thelate Lord Falkland Well. On ...
* "I knew thelate Lord _Falkland well . On Sunday night I beheld him presiding at bis own tabic , in all tbe honest pride of hospitality ; on Wednesday morning , at three o ' clock , I saw stretched before me all tbat remained of _courage , feeling , and a host of passions . "—iJj'ron . I" Lord Falkland was killed iu a duel by a Mr . Powell in 1 S 09 . It was not by words only that Lord Byron gave proof of sympathy onthe melancholy occasion . Though his own difficulties pressed on liim at tlie time , lie contrived to administer relief to the widow and cldldrea of his friend . " ! f ' Ycs : aud a precious chase they led me . " —Byron , 1816 . J " . Fool enough , certainly , then , and no wiser since . "Byron , 1 S 16 .
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Common Sense, Addressed Tome Ixiunrmts O...
COMMON SENSE , Addressed tome _IxiunrmTs of Amebic * - Bt Thomas Paise . London : B . D . Cousins , IS , Duke-strcet , Lincoln ' s-inn-fields . Amongst the excellent works advertised in this paper by Mr . Coosa's , the writings of the celebrated Thomas Paise occupy a prominent position , and claim a few words from us in introducing them to our readers . Wc hope to speak of Thomas Paixe ' s productions , or , at least , the chief of them , seriatim ; for the present we shall confine ourselves to a few -words on his Common Sense , the first-Trrittcn of Ills political woriis , and though by no means thc best , yet the most important in its results . Of course wc speak of results yet seen . Jiis celebrated Bights of Man is yet performing its mission ; and the mighty results which it has helped to sow the seeds of , have yet in their fulness to be produced , but produced thev will bo .
Thisllittle tract , Common Sense , is now somewhat out of date—it was written for a special purpose , and well it served that purpose , that of inducing the Americans to throw off the British yoke . Consisting for the most part of reflections on tbe then state of American affairs ( 1776 ) . and arguments snowing the necessity and practicability of independence—it is chiefl y valuable as an historical document , and its value in that respect cannot be over-estimated . In centuries to come , when the historian shall set himself to the task of describing the birth of the great ropublicof theWest , this modest little pamphlet will be his first thought , and its contents the choicest of the stores from which to gather the materials for his history .
The agitation against thc "mother-country . " or rather against the men and measures under which the coionist _* . suffered , had continued far years and even actual hostilities had gone on for some months before anyone seems to have thought of the only object worth siruggliiigand lighting for , the independence of the colonies ; at least if thought of , the thought was not avowed . Thus the colonists were in the auaniolous position of subjects fighting against their ( yet acknowledged ) lawful soverei gn . Ia this position they were rebels , liable to military execution
if captured or conquered , and shut out , if not from the sympathies , at least from the help of other nations , who , while they might be disposed to assist an independent power in its war with Britain , were not likely to give assistance to mere revolted subjects . This consideration alone was snfh ' cieiit to induce Thomas Paine to take the side of independence ; he saw that there was no road to justice and safety but throuih victory , and that to be victors the colonists must as a nation call forth their national resources , and _cliallcn-je the _sympathies of other states in their behalf .
Accordingly Thomas Paixe produced this little work . The powerful arguments be brought forward in support of his proposition that the colonists should sever their connexion with Britain , were unanswerable and unassailable ; and the fruits were speedily _«* n . The first edition of the pamphlet bore date Feb . 14 th , 1776 , and so rapid was the conversion of public opinion to thc doctrine of independence , that in less than five months from thc first appearance of the pamphlet , a Continental Congress had assembled and proclaimed ( on the 4 th of July , 1776 ) the colonies to be ' Free and Independent States ;" the consequence of that declaration , all men know . We give a specimen or two of the eloquence of this celebrated man .
• _rne time . The sun nerer sinned on a cause of greater worth . Itis not the affiiir ofa city , a country , a province , or of a kingdom , but ofa continent—of , at least , one-eighth part of the habitable globe . It is not the concern of a day , a year , or an age ; posterity are involved in the contest , and will _bs more or less affected , even to the end of time , by the proceedings now . Sow is the seed-time of continental union , faith , and honour . Tbe least fracture now , will belike a name engraved with the point of a pin on the tender rind of a young oak ; the wound will enlarge with the tree , and posterity read it in full-grown characters .
_EECON-CILIATION * . Soman was a wanner wisher for reconciliation than myself before the fatal 19 th of April , 1776 , but the moment tbe event of that day ivas made known , 1 rejected the hardened , sullen-tempered _l'haroali of England for ever , and disdained the wretch , that with the pretended title of Father of his People , can unfeelingly hear of their slaughter , and composedly deep with their Wood upon his soul . FEEEDOH _' S _KEFCSE . O je that love mankind ; ye that dare oppose , not only tht tyranny , hut ths tyrant , stand forth : every spot of
Common Sense, Addressed Tome Ixiunrmts O...
the old world is overrun with oppression . Freedom hath been hunted round tlieglt . be . Asia an 1 Africa have long cxpdlcd her , Europe regards her like a " stranger , and England hath given her warning to depart . 0 receive the fugitive ! aud prepare in time an asylum for mankind . Englishmen may be justly proud that Thomas Paine was a native of their fatherland , and a day will come when those honours will be paid to his name and memory , which , though long since due , never can be discharged until the many shall be free . We confess that our dislike of many things American is considerably strengthened by the fact of the almost total _disregard in which P . _usiYs name appears to be
now held in the State * . In Paise's lifetime the American Congress was not uii _.-rateful for his services , and oftlie re ; urn made by that body to tlic man wh » had so signally aided the cotmtiy _' tbcy represented , we complain not . What we complain of is , that while almost divine honours arc paid to the memories of Washington , _Jeffoi-son , and others of the great spirits of the revolution , thc name of P . u . ve is passed over with indifference . Is it because he was only an adopted , not a ' native" citizen of the Republic ? Whatever be the cause , the injustice is evident , and for the ' sake of the American character is to be deplored .
Inthe two first chapters of Comm on Sense , there is mixed up with much that is excellent , ' something that is unsound . All tiie writer ' s arguments against monarchy and hereditary succession are perfectly unexceptionable . The unsoundness wc allude to is , where Paixe represents the Crown as the overbearing part of the English Constitution , and that the despotism existing in England owes its existence to the fact oftlie Crown having engrossed the Commons . To acertain extent this was perhaps true in Paixe ' s day , though eren then the " ovci ¦ bearing- " power of the Crown could not have existed but for the corruption and baseness of the Commons . The Commons before Paixe ' s time had twice shown that their power far exceeded that of the Grown . First , thev liad
deposed and nut to death thc King , following that up hy abolishing th House of Lords ; second , ihey deposed and- expelled another lvim . * , and invited a foreigner to take his place . Subsequently these " rascal Commons" passed a law to enable them lo retain their seats for seven years , and for sixty veal's resisted all attempts made from within or without to reform their constitution . Even in Paixe ' s time , therefore , the " preponderating . influence of the Crown" arose yc _' _ie . y _fraiii thc corruption of tlic Commons . ' But in theprcsent day it would be farcical to talk about thc " preponderating influence of tho Crown , " the Crown having , in reality , no influence at all . Thc monarch is now a mere gilded puppet ,
the Lords have degenerated into mere registrars ot the edicts of the Cmiimmi : ; , the Ministers ( who for the time being , share the monarchy amongst tliem ) owe all their power to the Commons . The House of Conunoua is England's real Government , and England ' s despotism . Hut , that house itself is but tlie creature of the electoral body , which body is , therefore , responsible for the existence of tho present despotism , and all the crimes , and all the wrongs of which that despotism is the author and perpetrator . Tho _^ ini / _Stocrflci / _, the kings of the shops , are the real enemies of the peoples * rights , and the only class , whose power is formidable , that stands between tbe many and justice .
In reading Common Sense the reader must bear in mind that the ideas of the author , as a political writer , were by no means matured at the time he penued this work : it is in his later productions that we must look for teaching more applicable to the present time , and times to conic . The following extracts will , however , show that Common Sense is not deficient in useful instruction even for the present period : —
SOCIETY _AXD COVEBXMEST . Some writers have so confounded Society with Government , as to leave little or no distinction between them ; whereas tliey are not onl y different , but have different origins . Society is produced by onr-wants , anil Government by our wickedness ; the former promotes our happiness positircfy , hy uniting our affections :-tho latter negatively , by restraining our vices . The one encourages intercourse , the otlier creates distinctions . Thc first is a patron , tbe lost a punishcr . Society , in every state is a blessing , hut Government , even in its best state , is but a necessary evil ; in its worst state , an intolerable one ; for when we suffer , ov are exposed to thc same miseries by a Government , which we _nriaht expect in a country _roilJioiit Government , our
calamity is heightened by reflecting , that we furnish the means by which we sutler . Government , like drcs ? , is the badge of lost innocence ; the palaces of Kings are built on the ruins of the bowers of Paradise . For , were the impulses of conscience clear , uniform , and irresistibly _obeyed , man would need no other lawgiver ; but that not being tlio case , he finds it necessary to surrender up a part of his properly to furnish means forthe protection of the rest ; and this he is induced to do by the same prudence which iu every other case , advises him out of two evils to choose the least . Wherefore security being the true design aud end of Government , it unanswerably follows , that whatever form thereof appears most likely to ensure it to us with the least expense and greatest benefit , is preferable to all others _.
_MON-vacnv asd _uebeditaw' * _supcEssios . To the evil of Monarchy we have added that of Hereditary Succession ; nnd as tbe first is a degradation and lessening of ourselves , so the second , claimed as a mutter of right , is an insult and imposition on posterity . For all men being originally equals , no otic by birth could have a right to set up his own family in perpetual preference to all others for ever ; and though himself might deserve jomc decent degree of honours of his contemporaries , yet his descendants might be far too unworthy to inherit them . One of the strongest satdbal proofs of the folly of Hereditary right in Kings is , that nature disapproves it , otherwise she would uot so frequently turn it into ridicule by giving mankind an ' _ossfor a lion .
Secondly , as no man at first could possess any other public honours than were bestowed upon hiin , so tbe givers of those honours could have no right to giveaway the right of _posterity . And though they might say , " ll _' e choose you for onr head , " tliey could not , without manifest injustice to tlieir children , say , " that your children , and yonr children ' s children , sliall reign over ours for ever , " because such au unwise , unjust , unnatural compact _mijjht , perhaps , in the next succession , put them under the government ofa rogue or a fool . Most wise men , in their private sentiments , have ever treated Hereditary Right witli contempt ; yet it is one of those evils which , when once established , is not easily removed ; many submit from fear , others from superstition , aud the most powerful part shares with the King the plunder of the rest .
England , since the conquest , hath known some few good Monarehs , but groaned beneath a much larger number of bad ones , yet no man in his senses can say that their claim under William the Conqueroris a very honourable one . A French bastard landing with an armed banditti , and establishing himself King of England , against the consent of the natives , is , in plain terms , a very paltry , rascally original . It certainly hath no divinity in it . However , it is needless to spend much time in exposing the folly of Hereditary Right ; if there are any so weak as to believe it , let them promiscuously worship the ass and the lion , and welcome ; I shall neither copy their humility nor disturb their devotion .
Another evil which attcnQsheredilary succession is , that the throne is liable to be possessed by a minor at any age ; all which time tbe regency , acting-under tlie cover of a king , have every opportunity and inducement to betray their trust . The same national misfortune happens r . hen a king , woru out with age and infirmity , enters the last stage of human weakness . In both there cases the public becomes a prey to every miscreant who can tamper with thc follies either of age ov infancy . The most plausible plea which hath ever been offered in favour of hereditary succession is , that it preserves a nation from civil wars ; and were this true , it wouldbe -weighty -, whereas , it is the most barefaced falsity ever imposed upon mankind . The whole History of England disowns the fact . Thirty kings awl two minors have reigned in that distracted kingdom since the Conquest , in which time there have been ( including the Revolution ) no less than eight civil wars and nineteen rebellions . Wherefore , instead of making for peace , it makes against it , and destroys the very foundation it seems to stand on .
If we inquire into the business of a king , we shall find that in some countries they have none ; and after sauntering away tlieir lives without pleasure to themselves or advantage to the nation , withdraw from the scene and leave their successors to tread the same idle ground * In absolute monarchies the whole weight of business , civil and military , lies on the king ; the cliildren of Israel , in tlieir request for a king , urged this plea , " that he may judge us , and go out before us and fight our battles . " But in countries where he is neither a judge nor a general , a man would be puzzled to know what is his business .
In England the king hath little more to do than to make war and give away places ; which , in plam terms , is to impoverish the nation and set it together by the cars . A pretty business , indeed , for a man to be allowed eight hundred thousand sterling a year for , and worshipped into the bargain . Of more worth is one honest man to society , and in the sight of God , than all the crowned ruffians that ever lived . Some of our old soldiers of freedom may think it superfluous to call attention in this 1815 to the works of Paixe ; if so , we must be permitted to think otherwise . The boys of a few years ago are young in
men now , and these voting men have , an _pi-ouabilitv , an iniportant ' part to perform in the future * it is , therefore , essential that their minds should be well prepared against the day of conflict and thc hour of victory . Thomas Paine will not teach them all they must learn , but he is an excellent schoolmaster to begin with . Ko other apology can be necessary for these remarks , or for those wc may offcron future occasions when calling attention to the works of this great Englishman . The price of this pamphlet our readers will see in Mr . Cousins' advertisement , and we hope that all who have not a copy by them , will exhibit their common sense by forthwith obtaining it .
Punch—Pabtxlix. London: Punch Office, 02...
PUNCH—PabtXLIX . London : Punch Office , 02 , Fleet-street . « . The contents of this part are generally excellent ; wo inust , liowevo «* vr _«* nt <* ¦ _. _¦ _Wlowi" -. . —*
Ar00306
_AMOTBEK TOUUG _OITE .-A new journal lias been started at New York , called Young America . We belicre the principles it advocates are—universal repudiation , mint-juleps ; , no- taxes , and a tarnation thrashing to ail the world . This is a sacrifice of truth to what , we presume ,, is intended for wit , but the wit , if tliere be any , is-too small for us to discover . What tho princ ' _iplea of Young America really arc , Punch may discover by merely taking the trouble to learn the principles of this paper . For further information , we refer our friend of the hunch to the extracts from Young America in our seventh page .
The inimitable " Caudle Lectures , " now read throughout Europe and America , arc continued in tiiis _plu-t , as rich and racy us ever . The articles on the Dahara atrocity , and the infamous ease ofsoldicrflogging at Windsor , arc of priceless worth , ami calculated to must materially serve the cause of humanity and _prosress . Well , remarks the writer of one these articles ( " The Cat at Windsor" ) :--Hon * very handsome is a regiment in all its flutter and glory of dugs and line trappings ! Tot let us pick the regiment to pieces—reduce it to units—and what a miserable soul-and-hody bartered creature is the son of glory who , if bis manhood revolt at indignity , may be lashed like a brute . Think of these matters—glory-loving youngster 'especially think of them , when thc recruiting serjeant mav seek to tempt you with this destroying shilling !
The illustrations are , ns u = ual , excellent—the best iii this part arc * ' Tlic Man wot plays several instruments at once , " and "Purifving Covent Garden Theatre . "
A Bowl Of "Pua'cu." Fresh Brewed.
A BOWL OF _"PUA'CU . " FRESH BREWED .
_YIVJ . LA . GUEHUE ! A WAR 80 SG FOR THE TRENCH IS ALGIERS Iii Dahra ' s caverns hidden Bide the Arabs , and delay To yield when tliey arc bidden ; So cries brave _Pvlissier" llrinj _faygotsof fierce fuel ! Frenchmen checked by Arab slaves ! We'll have a vengeance cruel . ' Roast them in their _saert-d caves ! We'll mak !; their fond trust falter ! Cast iii faggots ' . Let tficm flare , Ti'J vengeance hath an altar Fitly _furnish'd ! Vive la guerre . ' " Rush thc _spiu-ks in rapid fountains Up abroad into the sky ! From the buses of the mountains Leap the fork'd flames mountain-high ! The flames , like devils thirsting ,
Lick the wind , where crackling spars Mr ' _asc hellish warfare , _worsting AU the still , astonished stars 1 riy the furnace , _fliiijj thc faggots . ' Lo , the flames writhe , rush , and tear ' . And a thousand writhe like _maggots In among them 1 Vive la guerre ! A mighty wind is blowing T _' wards the cavern ' s gaping mouth The clear , hot flames are flowing In and in , to glut its drouth ; Flames with winds roar , rave , and battle-Wildly battle , rave , and roar ; And cries of men and cattle Through the turmoil sadly soar . Wc are pale ! What ! shall a trifle , . A sad sound , our bold hearts scare ? ¦ Tis long before they _stille ! Bring more faggots 1 Vive la guerre !
With night began tho burning ; Look where yonder comes the day ! Dark ! signals for adjourning Our brave sport . Wc must obey ! But be sure the slaves are weary !—As the short and sob-like sigh Of gusts on moorlands dreary-Float tlieir sinking voices by ;—No sound comes now of shrieking;—Let us sliow what Frenchmen dare 1 Force the caves , through vapours reeking Like a kitchen ! Vive la guerre ! What ' s this—and this f Pali . ' sick ' ning , Whether woman , man , or beast . Let us on . The fumes are tlikk'ning l—¦ Ho ! here ' s that hath shapo at least . Dow its horny eyes are staring On that infant , seeking food From its broad brown breast , still bearing
Smoke-dried stains of milk and blood ! At our work do any wonder , _Saying , " Frenchmen love the fair" ! Such "fair" ! 11 a ! ha ! tliey blunder Who thus twit us ! lire fa guerre ! What ' s that , so tall and meagre?—Nay , bold Frenchmen , do not shrink!—• lis a corpse , with features eager , _Jamm'd for air into a chink . Whence is that hysteric sobbing _* . — Nay , bold Frenchmen , do not draw ! 'Tis an Arab ' s parch'd throat throbbing . Frenchmen leve sweet Mercy ' s law : — Hake way there ! G ive him breathing ! How he smiles to feel the nir ! Ills breath seems incense wreathing To sweet Mercy ! Yivelngutm ! And now , to crown our glory , Got we trophies , to display As vouchers for our story ,
And mementos of this day ! Once more , then , to the grottoes ! Gather each one all he can—Blister'd blado with Arab mottoes , Spear-head , bloody yataghan . Give room now to the raven And the dog , who scent rich fare ; And 1 st these words be graven On the rock-side— "Vive la guerre !' The trumpet sounds for marching ! On ! alike amid sweet meads , Morass , or desert parching , Wheresoe'er our captain leads ! To Pelissier sing praises ! Praises sing to bold Rugeaud ! Lit up by last night ' s blazes To nil time their names will show ! Cry " conquer , kill , and ravage !" Never ask * ' who , what , or where 1 " f civilised , or savage , . Never heed , but—T 7 » i ! la guerre ! . r »
Tlik Duee Akd The Ratcatcher.— Tlie Dltk...
TlIK DUEE AKD THE RATCATCHER . — Tlie _Dltkc of Buckingham has a fine eye for a happy peasantry . On a Royal visit to Stowe , his Grace can group a thousand tillers of thc soil—in snowy smock frocks , washed expressly for the occasion—with the taste of a ballet-master . The Duke is thc farmer ' s friend ; and , therefore , descending a little in his benevolence , he is the friend of the labourer . Nevertheless , his Grace is a greater friend to leverets , though they
shall not be bigger than kittens . In the cast there are asylums and hospitals for reptiles ; and the man who could with meekest serenity contemplate the wants of his fellow biped , would feel the tenderest pity for a cock roach or a lizard . And in this spirit do somo of our gentlemen of England— " Merry England , " as sometimes , with a knowing look and tongues in their cheeks , they call it—preserve their game . Fine , imprison , grind to the dust the peasant —hut preserve the game ! Heap hot coals upon the grey head of the labourer—but preserve the game ! lie deaf to tho goodly reputation of forty years , and punish the dog in the pauper master ( for they are one and the same thing ) , but—preserve the game ! Tbe Duke of Buckingham ( represented by one of his
gamekeepers ) appeared a few days since at the Buckingham petty sessions against a ' * venerable-looking man , " although a rat ratcher , named "William White . Fearful odds ! " The judges were rangeda terrible show ; " for they were three preachers of the word of God , "thc Rev . Messrs . Eyre , Andrews , and Bayncs . " The offender , White , had caught rats for forty yeare ; and in that time had never been cited before a magistrate . lie had a wife and live children to support ; and ( rat-catching was not the best of trades , the reverend magistrates themselves _misht allow that ) at times it was a hard matter with him to get his crust in an honest way . He was crossing the public road , followed by three dogs . Ono of them went into a ditch , and brought out and killed a "leveret as big as a kitten ; " whereupon the _oflicer ofthe Duke of Buckingham—the labourer ' s friendcited thc dog ' s master before the bench . And then did tliese reverend men take counsel one with ot the
another : and , sympathising with the wrongs coroneted owner of the leveret " as big as a kitten , they ordered William White to " pay 18 s ., and in default fourteen days' imprisonment . " William W lute handed iii a written testimonial of good character , signed by man v men of good report ; and the reverend magistrates—what could they do?—looked at the document , and still the sentence was— lb 3 ., or fourteen davs' imprisonment . " Not a shilling' not a day was abated : but mercy was not wholly banished from the court ; time was given to the rat-catcher to earn the money . Thus , William White-his family , to be sure , will be pinched a little for bread the while —mav be enabled to discover how many vats mako tho value of one " leveret as big as a kitten , lie may aho learn thc true value of character ; may Icel how worthless is the reputation of forty years honest toil when his dog kills a leveret " as big as a kitten . And thus at beer-houses , bv the way-side , am at tlie
cottage-hearth , will the talc of the naughty VtiUiam White go round ; and , it is natural to suppose «¦ , __ a universal love for thc Duke of Buckingham inthe individual , and reverence for aristocracy in the abstract , will sink into the hearts of thc storytellers _. And thus will the reputation of the Duke of Buckingham descend . For though he may not mark his name in his country ' s councils—though , with the exception ofthe £ 50 clause , he may never be known as a legislator—still his name may travel from generation to generation of rustics , written in the blood of " leverets as big as kittens . " Yet is not all our sympathy for William White . So ; we feel a touch of compassion for his reverend judges . Apostolic . il aa they must be . we can imagine their moral struggles ,
Tlik Duee Akd The Ratcatcher.— Tlie Dltk...
the acutcness of their suffering ? , when called upon tn levy a crushing ( ine upon a vencrablo old man who _iias lived a life of honesty aud toil , for that his dog has killed " a leveret as big as a kitten . " Sure we are that , with their peculiar caste of thought , they must now and then ask themselves whether leverets , any more than field-mice , wore sent upon the earth to be ticketed ns the sacred property of any one owner . It is unfortunate that , when a _gnme-law sentence id peculiar cruelty is to be pronounced , a clergyman is generally on the bench to utter it . To be sure this may give more solemnity to the sacrifice , as in the olden day the victim was always sacrificed by a priest , —Punch .
Monstrous Case Of Crim. Con. Croydon, Au...
MONSTROUS CASE OF CRIM . CON . CROYDON , August 15 . ( Before Lord Chief Justice Tindalanda Common Jury . ) COOKK V . _WKTUI'UEtX , Cl . _KUK . This wns an _,-n-tjon brought by the plaintiff against the defendant , for criminal conversation with his wife * The __ case is of a most extraordinary character _, and it is _wiid that the damages were laid at £ 50 , 000 . i \ lr . _S-. rjeant Slice / Mr . _Montagu Chambers , and Mr . hdwiu James were forthe plaintiff ; Mr . Scr * _je- _'tnt Channel ! , Mr . Clarkson , and Mr . Lush , forthe ( _Jeit'nd . int . Mr . Serjeant Skce opened thc case , ami said the planitih was : Mr . John Mynde Cooke , a young man ,
nn attorney , who was very _rcspcctablv connected , the sou ot Mr . Cooke , of Capel Court , " Herefordshire , and he came into court to complain of the most serious injury that could be indicted by one man upon another , an injury that had embittered the _morning of his life , and which must deprive him of all happiness hereafter . The defendant was a man of fifty-five , a minister of tho Church of England , and at present the rector of liyfield , in Northamptonshire , and when ho told iliem that ho was charged " with ince 5 t and adultery svith his own daughter , he was sure thejury would give him credit lor feeling the deep responsibility of his task' , in having to lay sueh a ease before them . He would endeavour to lay tiie facts of this almost unexampled case boforc them with as much
calmness as he couM command , and would give the jury that evidence which , in his opinion , made out a clear and utinnsivorabie case on the part of the plaintiff . The defendant was most respectably connectcd . lie had married a daughter of a gentleman who atthc time filled the oiiice of chief magistrate ofthe City of London , and through his influence he obtained the rectory of Byficld , wliich w .-. s worth £ 1100 a year , and also had a fortune of £ 20 , 000 with his wife , who , however , had the control over that sum , and she settled it upon her daughter , thc lady whose misconduct was that day the subject of tlieir inquiry _. In 1839 , after her mother ' s death , the young lady came of age , and the money was then transferred by the _trustees to her name and came under her control ,
and it appeared that her father took a splendid mansion in Katon-place , where he lived in a style of gt cat splendour , and lav beyond his means , and it would appear that with the consent of theyounglady , her fortune was by degrees drawn from the Bank of " England , and eventually entirely squandered away ' within a little more than two years from the period of the young lady coming of age . The plaintiff was introduced to the family of the defendant abut this time . He was a young man of between one and two and twenty . He had just been admitted an attorney , and was very successful in his profession , and having a . fortune of his own to the extent of _.-ES 00 O , the brightest prospects were before him . Iu the summer of 1842 , he met Miss _Wethercll : lie was pleased with
her person , and he eventually offered her his hand , and was accepted . Mr . Cooke was sincerely attached to the young lady , but he would not deny that he did expect to receive somo fortune with his wife , / leifather objected to the marriage , and the terms of his refusal of Mr . Cooke were barely civil , and eventually they _weycmavi-iedwithonthisconsciitatSt . George ' s Church , Hanover-square . Tho young couple went on a tour for a short time , and upon their return the father appeared to be friendly , and they went to pay him a visit at his rectory at Byficld . Two or three flays had hardly elapsed when a gentleman named Nisbet made his appearance , and produced an acceptance of Miss WctliereH ' s for £ 500 , and insisted upon his right to look to the newly-married husband for
payment . The plaintiff was shocked at the news , and he felt that he had been cruelly deceived both by his wife and her father , lie knew that he was legally liable for the debts of his wife , and he therefore felt that it was _absolutely necessary for him to ascertain the exact amount of her liabilities and tho real position of her affairs . Notwithstanding that at this moment the plaintiff felt that he was almost entirely ruined by the treachery of his wife and father-in-law , his conduct towards the former appeared to be ofthe kindest description , and he read a letter from his wife to the plaintiff , couched in the kindest terms , to bear out his statement . The result of the inquiries made by the plaintiff satisfied liim that his wife was dreadfully involved . All her fortune had been
squandered , and sho had acceptances out to a yery large amount , and ho felt it only due to himself to . insist that her father should give an account of his stewardship , and that he should grant him an interview for that purpose . , This took place , and the defendant then admitted that he had wasted his daughter ' s fortune , and that sho had nothing left , and that the furniture , houses , and everything they had , had been made over by a bill of sale , or warrant of attorney , to different parties who had advanced money upon them . From this time Mr . Wethercll offered him every obstruction and opposition to obtaining his rights , and his wife invariably took the part of her father in resisting his wishes . After having coldly and unwillingl y accompanied her
husband to London , from Byficld , she eventually returned to her father , and although thc plaintiff repeatedly , in tho _mosteaniest and affectionate manner , entreated her to return to him , she invariably refused , and treated him with the utmost coldness and _unkindness , and he believed he should be able to show that the defendant had made the most shameful charges against her husband , and he in time succeeded in entirely alienating her affections from him . Tliere was , in fact , a total absence of everything like that kind of feeling which could be expected to animate the breast of a young woman of one and twenty towards a man to whom she had been married only two months . ( The learned serjeant here read some letters that had passed between the parties
confirmatory of his statement . ) Air . Cooke at length was compelled to take proceedings in Chancery , and eventually a deed was executed , by wliich the defendant admitted that he was indebted to his daughter in a sum of- £ 18 , 000 , and that large arrears of interest were also due to her , and ho undertook to repay the amount by yearly instalments of £ 500 , but to show that Mr . Cooke had acted in a perfectly disinterested manner , he did not take any interest under the deed , but tho whole amount was placed under the control and appointment of his wife . Immediately after this deed was executed the defendant wrote a letter to Mr . Cooke , forbidding him his liouse , ov having any intercourse with his wife , and this was all the return Mr . Cooke received for what he must call his most
generous conduct , ihe learned serjeant then referred te some other proceedings that had taken place , and said that all along the plaintiffs wife had evinced the utmost hostility to him , and opposed him in every proceeding he adopted . The plaintiff could not account for such conduct , but at length ho received some information whicli induced the most horrible suspicion upon his mind , and his subsequent inquiries led to the present charge being made against thc defendant . The parties who gave the information had no interest in making such an odious charge against the defendant . They were persons of humble station certainly , but he believed of _^ unblemished character , andthe result ofthe inquiries made by Air . Cooke , through their information , left no doubt upon liis
mind that tho defendant had been guilty of thc dreadful crime of incest and adultery . He should call before thejury the servants in the house in Eatonsquare , and thoy would prove that they had always entertained a suspicion of the character of thc intimacy between the defendant and his daughter , and that having watched , they were satisfied that thoy were in thc habit of continually sleeping together as man and wife , and he should also prove tliat the defendant was seen at all hours ofthe night in his daughter ' s bed-room . The learned- serjeant then stated other facts of a similar character , which need not be further alluded to , but the effect of which he said was to satisfy all the servants that a most improper intimacy was being carried on . Tho learned
serjeant then proceeded to state that he should prove that , suspicion having been entertained that Mrs . Cooke was in the family way , from her stout appearance and other indications , shehadgono into the country with her father , where miscarriage had evidently taken place . After enumerating other circumstances , the learned serjeant concluded a vcrv able address by observing that to talk ofthe amount of damages in such a case as this was perfectly unnecessary . If he made it out , he was sure the jury would think no amount of damages too large , or that any sum could be a sufficient reparation to the plaintiff for the cruel injury he had received . Witnesses were then called to bear out tho learned counsel ' s statement .
At the close of tho plaintiff ' s case , the further proceedings were adjourned . _,, „ ' „ - . ¦ ¦ - " ¦ 7 _, . , GnoYDos , August 1 G . lhe Court sat at nine o ' clock , and the names of the jury having been called over , the cause proceeded . It was stated that the reverend defendant had been in consultation with liis counsel , Mr . Serjeant Channel ! , until a late hour onthe previous night , and itwas resolved that no witnesses should be called tor the defence , although itwas understood there were a good many in attendance . _, Mr . Serjeant _Channeil proceeded to address the jury tor thedefendant . He said that the evidence in support ofthe plaintiff ' s case having been concluded , it was now lor tho jury to consider the effect of that evidence , and it became his duty to make some observations respecting it , and he declared that having attentively considered the whole that had been adduced to support the odious charge that was mado against the defendant , he did not entertain any fear . but that the jury would find _stverdiot _inftiYOtirof the
Monstrous Case Of Crim. Con. Croydon, Au...
defendant . His learned friend had truly described tho present proceeding as a _prosecution—the' defendant wasnot there tonnswer with his life , certainly ; but the effect ofa verdict of guilty would be worse than death —it wonld render life of no . value—there would bean end of all human happiness , everything that could make life _am-eeable or desirable would'be' destroyed , . _-irui life would be a _cura-. A verdict of guilty would also entail a curse upon the being to irlioin the defendant had given life , and would placo her for the remainder ol her days under the most odious ignominy , and would render her life a burden . . When he considered these ' results ' that must inevitably follow an ail verse verdict to the defendant , and looked at tlie evidence by ' which ' such a dreadful charge was sought to be supported , he , however , felt
satished ih . it the verdict must bo for the defendant _, lie would remark to thejury that it was not becnu * . o peivons c . iinc forward , and swore positively to certain occurrences having taken place , they were therefore to take it for granted that they were true . In such an awfulchnrj-c as the present , he contended that the jury ought to insist upon having clear and undoubted testimony before they returned an adverse decision to the party accused of such an odious and horrible offence . Tim jury should vemem ' _ner that _thc-y were not inquiring into the question whether the defendant had been guilty' of folly and extravagance , or whether he had squandered his daughter ' s fortune . It might ho very true that he had done so , but the jury had nothing to do with it . Tlio main and only question for them to decide was , whether the defendant was proved upon undoubted evidence to have been
guilty of the foul crimes of incest mid adultery ? With regard to the circumstances ofthe parties , _Ikbcgned thejury to remember that there wis nothing to show that the defendant and his daughter were not living happily , and in comfort , at the time the plaintill' was lirst introduced to them , and under what circumstances did thc marriage take plate ? After only five or six visits , the plaintiff , no doubt , believing tliem to be persons of wealth , made an offer of marriage , but was refused by thc defendant , and then , with the assistance of his friends , Captain _GosdeU _, Mr . Rctd , and Mr . Waddy , he got the young lady to leave her father ' s liouse , and to marry him without her father ' s consent . It was not very likely that the defendant would at first be friendly with the man who had acted in such a manner , but there was every reason to believe that tho defendant did afterwards
receive his son-in-law on friendly terms ; and it was evident , by his endeavouring to let his house in Eaton-square , and the otlier steps ho took , that he was anxious to make what reparation he could for the past extravagance , and that he desired to raise a fund for thc benefit of his daughter . Thc defendant did not deny that he had made an improper use of his daughter ' s fortune , and hewas willing to make all the reparation he could . The jury could see the hostile feelings exhibited by the plaintiff all through the case . He most improperly took forcible possession ofthe house in Eaton-square , and when he was compelled toleave it through ' the interference of the magistrate , he went down to Byficld , no doubt , with the same object . The plaintiff " then took his wife to lodgings in Welbcck-strcct _, and after they had been
there . 1 sliort time lie left her . lie ' entreated the jury to read the letters that had been written to him by his wifo after this had taken place , most attentively , for he considered they were a complete answer to the case , lie was sure thejury would say it was impossible the woman who had written such letters , teeming with religion and virtue , and witli expressionsofioveand kindness for her husband , notwithstanding his ill-usage , could be guilty ofthe foul crimes imputed to her . It was clear she had an affection for her husband , and it was equally clear that there was a something in his conduct towards her , which had not been explained , which rendered it impossible for her to live with liim . It was not possible for human nature to be so depraved ns that a young woman could have penned such letters to her
husband when she knew that she had been guilty of the crimes ol * incest and adultery . He entreated them to read the letters attentively , and then ask themselves whether such letters could be written by a foul , disgraced , and abandoned woman , such as the defendant ' s daughter was sought to be made out to be by these proceedings ? Tlio learned counsel for the plaintiff had sought to make out that the plaintiff had acted very generously to Mr . Wcthcrell with regard to the settlement deed , and said that lie had no interest under it . lie ( Mr . Channel !) thought the deed bore a very different complexion , for in point of fact the effect and object of it was , to ' compel the defendant to repay , by instalments outof his living , the whole of thc money ofhis daughter that he had improperly expended , and , of course , thc plaintiff , . is
her husband , would have reaped all the benefit . The plaintiff sought to obtain the advantages of this deed by living with his wife ; and it was only when he failed , and found she was , for some reason which had not been explained , determined not to live with him , that this action was brought with a view to bring utter ruin and destruction upon both father and daughter . The learned counsel proceeded to make some remarks upon the evidence that had been brought forward to make out the horrid charge . If the evidence was to bo credited , they were to believe not only that an incestuous intcrcouso was carricd on between the defendant and his daughter , but that it was carried on under circumstances ' almost challenging exposure and detection . The charge , improbable and unnatural as it was in itself , was
rendered a thousand times more so by the circumstances under whicli it was alleged fo have been committed . The learned serjeant then commented with great severity upon the conduct of thc . servants of tho defendant who had been examined . He said , it could bo conceived tliat servants might not take notice of any ordinary irregularities in tho establishment of their masters , but here thc witnesses admitted they had continued , without makingremarlcs , for weeks and months , in a service where , if tliey told the truth , their master was openly , and almost unblushingly , carrying on an incestuous intercourse with his own daughter , that- daughter being a married woman , and he himself a clergyman ! Could
they place any _reliance upon the evidence of such _pci-toiis . "WohM any one having thc least regard for his credit or character have so acted , if what they stated had really occurred ? It was impossible , and lie submitted to thejury that they ought not to place any reliance upon thc evidence that had been given , It was difficult , nay , almost impossible to contradict evidence of thc description that had been given , but in his opinion there was abundant ground for the jury to entertain suspicion of tho whole case , and if this were so , their only safe course was to acquit the accused . Tlie learned serjeant concluded by expressing his opinion that thc case had not been made out , and he was satisfied tho jury would find it impossible to return a verdict for thc plaintiff .
Lord Chief Justice _Tindal summed up , and ihe jury having deliberated for a short time , expressed a wish to retire , and wero absent about half an hour , when they returned into court with a verdict for the plaintiff—Damages , £ 3000 .
Hydrophobia.—On The 20th Of Last Month A...
Hydrophobia . —On the 20 th of last month a young man ) ( the son of a fisherman of the name of Arkdcn _, residing in Barking-creek , whilst in a field in thc rear ofhis father ' s house , was bitten in the leg by a puppy ofthe mastiff breed ; the lad took but little notice of the place , and a few days afterwards it healed up . On Thursday morning he for the first time complained of a pain in the thigh , which increased until it reached the right side , accompanied by vomiting to an extent that compelled him to go home , and ho was put to bed . In the morning he complained of severe pains in thc head , thirst , and a feeling as if being strangled . His parents sent for Mr . Henderson , the nearest medical practitioner ,
and inthe interim thc mother desired her son to wash his face , but upon bringing some water he exhibited the most intense agony , dashing it from him , and fainting . In that state he was found by Mr . Henderson , who immediately declared it to be a euse of hydrophobia . Thc usual remedies were applied , but with little effect . At one time it required the united efforts of four men ( although he was but seventeen years of age ) to hold him down , lie was finally fastened to the bed , and at his own request his eyes were covered , as even the shutting ofa door , or the passage of any one across the room , creating the slightest air , affected him in a most frightful manlier . He expired on Sunday morning . —Globe .
Sisooun Reiubx of Stolen Property . —The shop __ of Mr . G , Davies , of _Dolgelly , in the county of Merioneth , was burglariously robbed , and a very large quantity of watches and jewellery stolen , on the morning of thc 4 th of January . In June last , a man named Jonathan Jones was apprehended as being one concerned in thc robbery , and four of the watches were found by Mr . Hill , the active superintendent of police at Chester , in a box belonging to the prisoner . Jones was tried at thc last assizes and transported for fifteen rears . The report of the trial appeared in tho Times under the head of " North Wales Circuit . " It was strongly suspected that a man residing at Chester , named Philip Dixon , was an accomplice ( it was on his information Jones was apprehended ) , but no evidence could be adduced against him . On the morning of Saturday , the lGth inst ., a box arrived for Mr . Davies by thc Chester carrier , which , on opening , he was most agreeably
surprised to find filled with thc proceeds ot the robbery , there being ninety-six watches , and a large quantity of rings , itc . —in fact , all that he recollected to have lost , except tho four watchc 3 above-mentioned . The box was accompanied by a small brown paper parcel , in which was a letter directed to Mr . Davies ( not signed , of course ) , . which , was written badlv , and savins , that "her beg to return him his nropertv . " All that the carrier knows is , that the box and " parcel were brought to the waggon byaman , small in size and unknown to him . ihe _> affair , as may bo imagined , has caused a great stir m this quiet town , and all are glad of tho happy return , as Mr . Davies is a man much respected , and was very much sympathised with by every one . The " Dark Aoes . "— " Tlio boy at thc head ol the class will state what were the dark ages of the world . " Boy hesitates . " _t-ext—Master Jones , can'tyou tell us what the dark ages were V Boy— "I guess they were the ages before spectacles were invented . " " Go to vour Beat . "
M M& ¦ _ ... .
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Exktbb Hall Jxm.Vkst.Sir Culling Eardlcy...
Exktbb Hall Jxm . VKST . Sir Culling Eardlcy Smith , John Dean Paul ,-and James Lord , _lespectivelv the chairman , treasurer , and secretary ot » body ' which styles itself tho Anti-Maynooth Committee , have * issued a circular , stating , that in their efforts to oppose the Maynooth Endowment ; Bill that Association has contracted deots to the amount of £ 732 Ms . lid ., whieh it is unable to defrny , und demanding assistance , in order to discharge
tnem . The Anti-Miivnootii Committee has manifestly committed itself ; but how can people havo tho conscience to ask charitv of others who have so little ot it themselves ? In stirring up thc fircsof _religious animosity , the Kxeter-llallites have burnt their own lingers , and arc'descrvedlv sniarting in consequence . Let us hone that thc burnt children—for childish enough they are—will dread the lire . Wo shall not be sorry to see an execution put into their hall , and their platform and other propcrticssold up . May no misplaced sympathy avert , that most devoutly-to-be wished consummation!—Punch .
1 _' _uni . _ic S . _ifkty . —Accidents arc becoming so plentiful on the railways that wc seriously propose that an Act of Parliament should be passed next _session , making it penal for any railway to start without one or more directors in each train . When their own lives are in jeopardy , we are sure the railway autocrats will sec tho necessity of tho greatest caution being used by every one employed " on thc line , to guard the public against injury . —Ibid . _Ciiaxoi . i _r Diet . —Wc see Mr . Forbes ' Mackenzie was amongst the number of guests at the ' Ministerial white-bait dinner . Wc hope the lion , member wns provided with sometliing better than his own words to eat ; for really nothing else seems to have passed Mr . Mackenzie ' s lips since he has joined thc mess of Ministers . —ibid .
Beoin at Homk . —John Adams , cs-prcsident of the United States , being called upon for a contribution for foreign missions , said , " 1 have nothing to give for that purpose ; but there arc here in this vicinity six ministers , not one of whom will preach in the other ' s pulpit . Now , I will give as much or moro than any one else to civilise these clergymen . " Trover Ixqumr . —A lady reading that a man had been sentenced to six months' hard labour for dogstealing , observed to a friend , _witliashii-Jiler , "Gracious ! my love , what would certain of our sex havo to endure for entrapping m / _i-iiu-. _' . '''
Bums of a Feather vill flock _tooetiier . —Roebuck recently declared in his place in the House , that " perhaps wilh some half-dozen exceptions , the whole House were dabblers in railway shares . " Upon hewing this , Sibthorp threw a terrific somcrfault across thc table , and pouncing upon the littlo M . P . I ' m- Uatb , exclaimed , " 1 never thought ifc would come to this , but 1 must shako vour hand , by G-d ! " ¦ . Each to ms Taste . —It was remarked at the Cabinet white-bait dinner that Buccleuch ' s Duke stuck lo that right royal fish the sturgeon , 1 _' cel to gudgeon , and Graham to plaice . The rest of thc ministcrials snapped up all the loaves ami fishes that eame te hand with every sign of an inordinate appetite . A Fact . —Every litfle lad in Yorkshire knowssufKcient of scripture history to be able to inform you who was saved when the world was drowned ; for if the question be put to him , " My lad . can you tell me who built the ark ? " he will nnswci * " Nou . "
Spkculatiox Exthaokdinaiiy . —The Record of Tuesday last contains an advertisement calling the attention of " Christian _Cujntalists to a scheme for the extension of Evangelical Truth , requiring tin outlay of from £ 2000 to £ 5000 . and _iiiMiring ton or fifteen per cent , on the sum expended !" _TVlint , sell the tkctii !—wc think wu hear the din , And groan of Evangelical " O , fits ;" Why sell your truth ? You'll make u heap of tin , With hiss _hypoi-risy , by soiling lies ' . Oli . ' why should you—with stock on hand to sell , Tell truth so badly , who tell lios so well , Joe Miller . Names for Railway _Tksdkbs . —The " Smasher \" the "Crusher ! " thc " Grinder ! " and the " In _at-the-Death . "—Ibid .
A Reason . —Why was the Squireen murdered iu Tipperary?—Bokase he swore he'd be a white-boy , and he kept a black boy . '—Ibid . Tns Cm- of tiik I Aiii . it . —Why did tho King of Bokhara persecute the Graver Missionary ?—Because he wentas a " Wolff" in sheep's clothing ;—Ibid . Ghace ANn Disgrace . —What are the most disgraceful postures and positions _?—/»«• postures and mi-positions arc the most dis-gvaccM . —lbid . Brougham and Sophocles . —Brougham called an .
Empress a Statesman—Sophocles , in his play-bill , has made one ofhis dramatis personal ablind Sea , _Cambrhige Canvassing . —A Cambridge butcher being canvassed during thc late contest for Mr . Adair , by one of that gentleman ' s friends , ho pointed to a , leg of mutton banning in thc shop , and said , " That's a line leg , sir . " " Yes , it is , " was thc reply . " Ifc weighs lOlbs ., " added the man in blue , " and it * prico is £ 5 per pound . " " Then , " said the canvasser , " it will suit Mr . Kelly's party's appetite better than Mr . Adair's , " and left the shop .
An Equivocal _DKoLAnATiox . —A cleanly-shaved gentleman inquired of a fair _damoisclle , the other day , " whether or no she admired moustacnios 1 " " O , " replied the charmer , with an arch look , " I invariably set my face against tliem . " Very shortly afterwards his upper lip betrayed symptoms of careful cultivation . Ax American Marvel . —The Eaton Rcgistcrslutcs , on " the authority of a Mr . Woodward , of Warren county , Ohio , "said lo be a man of veracity , " that thc citizens of Lebanon lately proceeded to ' disintcr the body of a Mrs . Irwin , with a view to place it by the side of her husband ' s remains , and found it petrified ! To complete the phenomenon , they were all "petrified—with astonishment . "
Fakaii'si * Regained . —The GotpeU ! anncr ( American paper ) says that a schooner , built a short time since at Eden , Hancock county , Maine , is called " The Garden . " Of course she is the floating Garden of Eden , and so she is named upon her stern . Captain Adam Wilkins is her master ; Abel Randall is mate ; and Mrs . _Eveline Wilkins ( Captain Adam ' s wife ) is cook . More " Great Facts" por " Little Folks . — A Yankee Jad , whose father was a farmer , went into a barn to play a short time ago , and being detained a prisoner by " a thunderstorm , he fell asleep upon a bag
of guano . Tlie old gentleman , when the storm was over , went into the farm-yard to look for his son , and met a giant , eight feet high , coming out ofthe barn . " Hallo ! who arc you ? " he cried ; " what are you doing hero ? " " Whv , father , " squeaked the Goliah , " it ' s mc -, don't you know Tommy ?" - " You !" ¦ the astonished parent exclaimed ; " why , Tom , how on airth did you get stretched out so long in so sliort a time ? " " Whv , father , " replied the boy , looking down upon the gaping old man , " I slept upon thein bags of guano as you put in thc barn , and that and thc lightning together just did the business !"
A fair Tradkr . —A widow of tho name of Rugg having taken a Mr . Price for her second husband , and being asked bv a friend how she liked the change , replied , " O , I have sold my old Rugg for a good Price . " Good for the _Gasuer , Goon ron toe Goose . — The ladies of . Springfield , U . S ., are organising an opposition to the Odd Fellows , under the title of " The Independent Order of Strange Women 1 " Lucky Bon . — " Come , Bob , tell us how much you have cleared by your speculation ? " said Bob ' s quiz ** zical friend to him the other day . " Cleared ! " replied Bob , with a frown , " why , you fool , I ' ve cleared my pockets . " _Evii-SEfittKiXG axd Backbiting . — Much inquiry having been made concerning a gentleman who had quitted a company where Dr . Johnson was , and no information being obtained , at last Johnson said , " I don ' t like to speak ill of any man behind his back , but 1 believe thc gentleman is an atloriwj . "
Candid Acknowledgment . — Amongst thc advertisements in a late London paper , wc read that " Two sisters _ivant washing ; " and that a spinster , particularly fond of children , wishes for two or three , or any other employment ! "The _iikkliest of the two . "—Lord Brougham once said he hoped to sec the day wh 6 n every poor man would be able to read and understand Bacon . Cobbett said it would be much more to the purpose if he could devise thc means of enabling them to eat bacon . ¦ ... Beatino the Mail . —An Iowa editor acknowledges the receipt of congressional documents "in advance of thc mail , " in consequence of a flock of wolves and an old she bear chasing the post rider across the prairies ' .
Mesmeric Honours where they are kot Wanted . —The following letter lately appeared in thc Times , from the Librarian of the Athcnamm Club , who happens to bear the same name as thc Lecturer on Mesmerism : —Sir , May 1 trespass upon your kindness for tho insertion bf this letter ? It is my last hope , my last chance of relief from sufferings caused by the reputation of another . You may remember , that in November last , Miss Martineau stated she had been restored to health by mesmerism and Mr . Spencer Hall . Lectures in that name were subsequently advertised in vour paper , and the lecturer was in requisition . Unfortunately thc public selected me to be tho man . I denied it , —in vain ; I am still
doomed to the inconvenience of that most mistaken conviction . 1 have borne wit , that has sorely tried the charity which enjoins you to consider your friends * wit no" evil . I have sufifered for opinions to an extent that should earn mo a wood-cut and chapter in a book of martyrs . I have received visits with the courtesy ofthe afflioted , and the resignation of hint that hath no helper . But I am not the lecturer , and tho wit wearies , the visits interfere with my duties , andthe opinions oppress like opiates . I know nothing of mesmerism , except that it induces sleep . I trust , after this denial , 1 may fee allowed to exist in quiet . —1 have the honour to be , sir , your obedient ; i servant > _SmcsR Haia , Librarian .
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Citation
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Northern Star (1837-1852), Aug. 23, 1845, page 3, in the Nineteenth-Century Serials Edition (2008; 2018) ncse.ac.uk/periodicals/ns/issues/ns4_23081845/page/3/
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