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- A CHBISIHA 3 GABLA >* D . " rm . the stirrup cup Trith glee ; Sing » merry roundelay j Christinas "brings Its revelry : Itence , and sng , anaiefs "be fay . ffey'ibrinirth anS joliitT-- Push about the ruby -wine - Merry let the minstrel piajj " Care and mirth can ne ' er conibine . " A . T ^ eleome , good reader , and good cheer to tfaee : fcr again approaches the lead and chief of '' . Merry F . TiglaTvf ^ Bappj holidays—alas ! too few- ^ jolly " , Wholly , dmstmaa . " "Whether the recast unaccountable , —we had almost - saidabominable , — --weather , In -which -with marrow
jreenng cold / was combined March - wind without 3 feh * h * s spr ing associaTions , and ( Jane ' s dust , "Withotit June ' s Trarmtli andlaaghtiiess , forming a trinity in ~ anity of annoyances most provoking and imbearable ; Trhether this -atmospherical scourge has congealed the ideas in the heads of out poets , maldng of tixelr Helicon a Serpentine , and turning their Parnassus into a-wintry -waste , we "know not - but -s-e atre . strongly tempted ' to this conclusion from ihe almost total absence of anything poetical relating to the season In the publications of the day which have come under our notice . "Winter , with its attendant erUsjis surely the direst curse that through their mortal career falls on the poor of this
metropolis . 3 f the-stealthy merchant , or fhe-weB-furred lady , ¦ whoseblood xons vrannj and vrhoarepleasantlv fed irith the juices of generous meats and costly drinks ; -whorwjth coats , and cloaks , and shawls and furs , seem prepared to iefy lie storm and disarm the drilling Hast ; if these , when exposed for a moment to log and frost shiver and cower hefore the enemy in -rain they guard against ; if such iKi £ h -well stored larders , well-nHed cellars , and "brightly "blazing hearths to greet them on iheir crossing the threshold of home ; if such fed keenly the biting blast of the wintry , storm , how much hea-der must the scourge of this cheerless season &H upon those who possess none of these hlessings .
"Poor naked wretches , ¦ irhereso ' eryouare , That hide the pelting of the pitiless storm . How shall your houseless heads ,- « tad unfed sides , Tow loop * *! and -vrindow * d raggedness , defend you Prom seasons such as these V Thus irrote our immortal Shaxskeaxb , too plainly -tdSng thst the " good © H days , " if they erer had an existence , were not in his time . How-much further back " Toung Enghvnd" would go to seek ibr those 4 ays we know not ; hut this is certain , list the searcher them , even in the -vaunted days of " Good Queen Bess , " would be fruitful only " of disappointment . ^ Esery was then the lot of the many . ifiserv is still their lot . Shall St ever beso ?
M »»! the misery , the thick-spreading wretchedness of this huge metropolis 1 We speak not now of the apparent and aB-appafling misery which stalks through London ' s interminable streets ; which festers in its £ ithy bye-Trays , and fructifies in its gmpalaces , prisons , And dens of prostitution . Of such ^ we speak not : but of that misery which , -vainly striving by incessant toil to staye off utter destruc tion , tools on unceasingly , and alas 1 unrewarded In our " Garland" for 18 M , appeared Hood ' s " Song -of the Shirt , " -which , of itself , -would fee aTfsufiMent for its author ' s fame , though he had neither "before nor since penned aught that " the world will not willingly let die . " That " Song" seemed for the moment to stir up the
heart of society : noris that stirring up jet forgotten . £ ut , if society lias a . lieart—a * matter which , according to Sir . D'Israeli , has been held in doubt , if not entirely forgotten—it would seem that that heart has been too long a stranger to right emotions to be more thsri temporarily excited eyen by the pen of a Hood : otherwise we should not haye heard , throngh the present year , so much of the continued and nnalleviated miseries of -the poor needle-women . But despite all discouragements , the cause of the poor and the oppressed cannot be considered as hopeless while such eloquent and earnest advocates as Miss Sheridan Carey are found , as in the following beautiful poem , to plead thai cause : —
A TTXK 5 TSG CBT , TcJHag from the morning gray-Toiling , toDjng through the day , TiD the spirit feints avray , Bound , in triple iron "bound ! 3 y the taper ' s fennWd light , T ^ fKr *^ -f ^ iT | rng zhrongih the ziigifct , T 21 the flinani ' Q ana a&nr > g sight Sees " but shadows gathering - round TiD the lip ' s irarm Jme is gone—Till the trow is worn and wan—Till tfre pitting Etm looks on Gasping slaves in stupor cast ; Toxfing -ibrongh the hours of pain , Taxing hand , and heart , and 'brain , Bread—and scared ? iread—to gain I Shall tMs—^ shall this erer last ?
Shall the spoiler seize by stealth Youth , and hope , end strength , aafl health ISatnre ' s dowry—5 atnre ' s -wealth—Shall they—shall they ever "be—Yo-ath and hope , an April "beam 1 Strength , delusion * health , a dream ? Age—a fearful ghastly ibeme—Pain , and grief , and penury ? Tsor nho ^ seest I Tboc who nearest 1 Tsov the monrners lieart who cheerest ! Tsor who Teil'din clouds appearest STrift , and lerrible , and strong ) TTnto Thee , -nith stony eye , Bloodless cheek , and boding cry , Boom'S to toil anS toil—or DIE , "Want appealeth , " Ixkkd , toiclcng ?"
Te TrhoEe " conSdenc = ~ is gold , Talse , rapacious , crafty , hold—TTbo the labourer ' s hire ¦ withhold ^—"Who the . frnits of toQ deny—~ 5 Tho the starring poor distress , "s ^ lio -Sie -g-pgv the old , oppress—Tremble ! They shall iave redress , Lo 1 their groans are heard on HIGH ' Tremble ! tremble ! -well ye may , Godless tyrants of a day , Trampling on yonr fellow-clay ] Trampline Tnarian hearts to dust 3 Tengeanee is ^ TXB Ix > ii >' s I berrare ! He will lift the poor man ' s prayer , Baise the erush'd , and chase despair ! T-rrants , wo . ' the Loxd is Jcbt I
"We cannot better follow up the aboye soul-stirring denunciation of gold-gorged yiHany , than by giving ihe foBoiting heart-inspiring ^ ies , hblaing out the promise « f a sure and certain glorious future for the human race . The author ( deceased ) is Hbxbi ~ Wxbx . ; we presume an American . We find the Bnes in that excellent American paper , the JhsUm Labourer .
-O ? P 5 I * iIO 3 S igTTATT . SOT jkX"W ^ TS 3 t £ IG 7 « PEpression shall not always reign : There cranes a 'brighter day , "WTjen freedom , lnrrst from erery chain , Shall hare triumphant iray . Then right shall orer might preraQ , And trnth , like iero armed in ma 2 , The hosts of tyrant trrong assaD , And hold eternal sway . 2 ea now , that glorious day draws near , Its coming is not too far ; In . earih and heaven its signs appear , " We see its morning star ; Its-da-wu ias ^ flushed tie eastern sky ; The ireetern "hiDa reflect it high ; The son them clouds before it Sj—Hnrrah I hnrrah I hurrah I
TThatTcdce will bid the progress stay Of troth's -rietorions car ? "What arm arrest the gro-wing day , Or quench the solar star ? "What dastard sonl , ihongh stout and strongj ShsR dare bring back the ancient wrong , And freedom ' morning bar ? The hour of uiumph comes apace ; The fated , yrootissd ionr , TTben earth , -upon a lansoxned Taee , Her beanteons gifts shall shower . Bing , libertj , tby glorions bell , BiS high thy sacred banner swell , Let timuuh on trnmph the triumph teB ,
ieaven ' g arengiog power . Tii £ &aj has come , The hotrr draws nigh , " We hear the coming car ; Send forth the glad , exulting cry , Hurrah ! hurrah ! hurrah ! Prom every Mil , by every sea , In Ebonts proclaim the great decree , "Ml cfeowu ore bunt , aU men are fret . '" Bxnrah ! Tmrrah 1 hnrrah ! But this was to be a Chnttmat Garland . In good sooth , but little yet about Christmas haye we written ; but Christmas , with its joyialities , must not be passed oyer . Prom " graxe to gay" is only fair . J-ast year , prnyT .-im Diceess ' s Chrtitmai Carst ippearerd too hvte for us to notice in our then " Garland . " No matter . Whateyer Dickens has
pennedmay at any time be read with as much pleasure and profitas when newly issued from the press . To such of onr readers as hare not read the Carol , tre say , get it by aU means if yon can . Better late * ban neyer . It would "be out of place , or rather out of time ,, now to " review" it ; we shall therefore restrict ourselyes to two or three extracts from that fielghtful book , which , could it be read by aUTnnndthat it were in the hands of aB—would do more to promote " peace on earth , and good will to men , " than aU the sermons -and homilies ever Uttered or penned . The moral of the book , that O » jr Christian ^ Spirit uvrHftg Tdndh ) in iU little tphen , ivhauver it may be , unU jand iu mortal life too don for iu van meam of ntgiUnea , is a gem of priceless worth . "Were these words written on the hearts of &R men ; was iheir spirit felt and
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acted up to : what an EJysium might tljJBrcarjtf be , instead of the '' yaleof . tears " -whicLio-iua » v Jindit . ; ^ T 4 CHXISTMAS HORNING . jjfe 2 . ~ ^ - ^ The honse fronts looked black enongh , ad |^ & ? Wi > l ^ ows blacker , contrasting -with the Kinoothifeiite sSect" of snowTipon tbe roofe , and -svith tlft » Sfra > ow m > on the ground r wfaicfe last deposit had ISleirploughed up in deep forroTvs by tiie heaTy -wheels-of -carts and wag > gon «; fvuTo-ws that crossed and re- « ibssed each other hundreds of times where the great streets branched off , ana made intricate channels , hard to trace . in the Thick yellow mnd and icj-ivaier . The sky was gloomy , and the shortest streets were chokea apwitha dingy mist , half thawed half frozen , whose heavier particles descended in a shower of sootv atoms , as if all the
chixnney 3 in Great Britain had , by one consent , caught fire , and -were blazing-away to their dear hearts' content . There was ¦ nothing very cheerful in the climate or the tora- and yet there was an = air of chearftilnesg ibroad , that the clearest summer sun might have endeavoured to diffuse in vain . For the people who were shovelling away on the house-tops were jovial and full of glee ; calling out to one another from the parapets , -and now and then exchanging a facetions snow-ballbetter-natnred missile far than many a ¦ wordy jesplaughing heartily if it went right , and not less heartily if it-went wrong . The poulterers' shops were still half open , and the fruiterers' were radiant in their glory . There were great , round , pot-bellied baskets of blwnuts , shaped like the Tvaistcoats of jolly old
gentlemen , lolling at the doors , and tumbling into -the streets in their apoplectic Opulence . There -were ruddy , brownfeced , broad-girthed , Spanish onions , shining in the fatness of their growth like Spanish Friars ; and winking from their shelves in-sranton slyness at the girls as they went by , and glanced demurely at the hung-up misletoe . There were pears and apples , clustered high in blooming pyramids ; there were bunches of grapes , made , in the shopkeeper ' s benevolence , to dangle from conspicuous hooks , that people ' s mouths might water gratis as they passed ; there ivere piles of filberts , mossy and lirown , recalling , in their fragrance , ancient 'walks among tbe "woods , aud pleasant shufflings ankle deep through ¦ withered leaves ; there were Norfolk biffins , squab ted swarthy , setting offthe yellow of the oranges andlem ^
sBtand m the great compactness of their juicjKpersoiSS , ¦ urgently entreating and beseeching to be canftedhome in paper bags and eaten after dinner . The TWa- " gold and silver fish , set forth among these chwbji'fi-uns in a bowl , though members of a dull anJ ^ tagnantblooded race , appeared to know that t&ere was something going on : and , to & . fish , went gasping round and round their little -n-or £ 3 ila slow and passionless excitement . The Grocers ' \ Q , the Grocers' ! nearly dosed , with perhaps two shutter * down , or one ; but through these gaps such glimpses J It was not alone that the scales descending on the counter made a merry sound , or that the twine and roller parted company bo briskly , or that the canisters were rattled up ana down like juggling tricks , or even that the raisins were so plentiful and rare , the almonds so extremely white , the sticks of cinnamon so long and so straight ,
the other spices so delicious , the candied fruits so caked and spotted with molten sugar as to make the coldest lookers-on feel ihint and subsequently bSious . Xor - » ras it that the figs were moist and pulpy , or that the Trench plums blushed in modest tartness from their highlv decorated boxes , or thai everything was good to eat and in its Christmas dress ; but the customers were all so hurried and so eager in the hopeful promise of the day , that they tumbled up against each other at tie door , clashing their wicker baskets wildh , and left their purchases upon the counter , and came ^ unning back to fetch them , and committed hundreds of the like mistakes in the best humour possible ; while the grocer and his people were so frank and fresh that the polished hearts with which they fastened their aprons -beiiuQ mighi nave been their own , worn outside for general inspection , and for Christmas daws to peck at if they choose .
THX CHSIBTHAS GOOSI AND PLCM PCDD 1 SG . Bob Cratchit turning up his cufis—as if , poor fellow , thej ¦ were capable of being made more shabby—compounded some hot mixture in a ju { T with . gin and lemons , and stirred it round and round and put it on the hob to simmer ; Master Peter and the Hvo ubiquitous young Crachits went to fetch the goose , with which they soon returned in high procession . Such a bustle tnsued that yon might have thought a goose the rarest of all birds ; a "feathered phenomenon , to which a black s-. van ¦ was a matter of course : and in truth it was something Terv like it in that house , ilrs . Cratchit made the gravy ( ready beforehand in a little saucepan ) hissing hot ; Master PeteT mashed the potatoes with incredible vigour ; Miss Belinda sweetened up the apple-sauce ;
Martha dusted the hot plates ; Bob took Tiny Tim beade him in a tiny corner at the table ; the two young Cratchits set chairs for everybody , nor forgetting themselves , ana mounting gnara upon their post * , crammed spoons into their mouths , lest they should shriek for gooEe before their turn came to be helped . At last the dishes were set on , and grace was said . It was succeeded by a breathless pause , as Mrs . Cratchit , looking slowly all aloDg the earring-knife , prepared to plunge it in the breast ; but when she did , and when the too long expected gush of stuffing issued forth , one mnrnrarof delight arose all around theboard , and e-ren Tiny Tim , excited by the two young Cratchits , beat on the table with the handle of his knife , and . feeblv cried " Hurrah ! " There never was such a
goose . Bob said he didn't believe there ever was such a goose cooked . Its tenderness and flavour , size and cheapness , were the themes of universal admiration . Eked out by the apple-sauce and mashed potatoes , it was a sufficient dinner for the whole family ; indeed , as Mr . Cratchit said with great delight ( surveyini , ' one small atom of a bone upon a tfish ) , they hadn ' t ate it all at last ! Yet crer ? one had had enough , and the youngest Cratchits in particular , were steeped in { -age and onion to the eyebrows ! But now , the plates b-ing changed by ifiss Belinda , ilrs . Cratchit left the room alone—too nervous to bear witnesses—to take the pudding mx , and bring ii in . Suppose it should not be done enough ' . Suppose it should break in tttmin ? it out ! Suppose somebody should have got over tbe wall
of the back-yard , and stolen it , while they were merry with the goose . ' a supposition at which the two youug Cratchits became lirid : All sorts of horrors were supposed . Hallo ? A great deal of steam . ' The pudding ¦ was OUt of the copper . A smell like a -washing-day . ' That was the cloth . A smell like an eating-house , and a pastry -cook ' s next door to each other , with a laundress ' s next door to that ! That was the pudding . In half a minute i £ rs . Cratchit entered , smiling proudly , with the pudding , like a speckled cannon-ball , so hard and linn , blazing in half of half-a-quartern of Ignited brandy , r and "be-dight -with Christmas holly stuck into the top . Oh I a wonderfol padding : Bob Cratchit said , and calmly too , that he regarded it as the greatest success achieved bv Mrs . Cratchit since their marriage .
Mrs . Cratchit said that now the weight was off her mind she would confess she had her doubts about the quantity of Hour . Every body had something to say about it , hnt nobody said or thought it was at all a small pudding foT a large family . It would have been flat heresy to do so . Any Cratchit would have blushed to hint at such a thins . At last the dinner was all done , the cloth was cleared , tbe hearth swept , and tbe Ore inade "np . The compound in the ju j being tasted and considered perfect , apples and oranges were put upon the table and a shorel-fnl ! . . of chesnnts on the jfire . Then all the Cratchit familv drew round the hearth , in
what Bob Cratchit called a circle , meaning half a one ; and at Bob Cratchit ' s elbow stood the family display of glass ; two tumblers , -and a custard-cup without a handle . These held the hot stuff from the jug , how-- ever , as well as golden goblets would have done ; and Bob served it out wi : h beaming looks , while the chesunts on tbe fire sputtered and crackled noisily . Then Bob proposed : "A Merry Christmas to ns all , mv dears . God bless us I" Which all the family re-echoed . ** God bless us every one . '" After so much of goose and pudding , —may every Cratchit in the land have a Diekens ' s dinner on Wednesday next!— 'tis time we dearedoHr pipes r so here goes with a chant for
THX laSLTTOE . Come . sing we a song of the misletoe ! For , a sturdy plant and free , It heedeth not when the north winds blow , And scathed is the stricken tree ; But on , in storm and snow it blooms , "When earth bath not a flower , And the plants have shrunk to their silent tombs From the scowling tempest ' s power . A proud and a mighty thing ! it throws Its branching arms around The bending oak , that , its patron , grows From the spurn'd and lowly ground . It asketh nought from the niggard earth , It needeth not the sun ; But , seated high in its pride of birth , Is it left its race to run .
The storm doth sweep the waste across ; The groaning forests bow ; On the deep the foaming billows toss To the bleak sky ' s frowning brow ; But gafly "waring to and fro , As the shrieking winds awake , 5 nB singeth the merry misletoe , Till earth doth in concert quake . Then raise we a song , a joyous song , For merry hearts there be , " TThilst tie spoiter ' -walkeih bis -way among The proud , the fair , the free . The knell hath toll'd , —the sound is old , — Unheeded let it fell ; And the song of the mystic misletoe In chorus join we all .
But what hare -we here ? As -we live , another Carol , another gift of beauty and of truth irons the ineihansiible brain of glorious Boz ; who , if ever writer deserved the title , truly does he deserve that proud one " the p oit op the poob . " Tes ; advisedly we say Poet . Where is the living writer , behe ever so great in prose or rhyme , who can so well , so truthfully describe the sufferings , the sorrowB , the hopes , the joys , of the million ? Who can paint tneminutia ^ f the life of Labour ' s children , without and within , alike that which is visible to the eve and that which , belonging to the inner man , mav be within the compass of a poet ' s ken but ^ of none other of thesons of men ? Such was the godlike power , toe exercise of which has made Shakspjsabb ,
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Brass , and Btbos , immoj-tal . . fTh ' fefiret ^ in ^ i'ist of these , unfolded to the world ' s gaze the-passions which agitate the breasts of kings and the mighty ones of the earth . Burks , on the other hand , took for his delineation the children of thepeople . By the side of Burns , Dickess will take his stand : and who could desire a destiny more glorious ? Some one , we forget who , defines poetry 1 to be " musical thought . " Tried by this test , where is to be found sublimer poetry than that which breathes through fevery page penned by Dickess ? Yes , Dickens is tie poet of the poor ; prouder position , greater glory , for now and for all time , no man could hope to acquire .
TBE CHBIES , A GOBLIN STORY OF S 03 TE 2 ELLS THAT RAXG AN OLD YEAR OUT AND A X £ W ONE IN . feieh is the title of Mr . Diekens ' s new work . For this week we forbear the critic ' s task , anxious as we are to at once-gratify our readers with a toothsome taste of the volume itself . The hero of this goblin story ia one Toby Veck , a ticket-porter , oftener called Trottu Veck . They called him Trottv for his pace , which meant speea ,
if it didn't make it . He was a weak , small , spare old man ; but poorly clad , and no ways a match for the sturdy assaults of a December blast , fiis post of duty was " a \> reezy , goose-skinned , blue-nosed , red-eyed , stony-toed , tooth-chattering place , " nigh to a church-door , whose goblin bells are made to ring out the chimes of this story . We have claimed for Mr . DiCKESB the title of Poet , and here , at the very outset of the work is a specimep of " musical thought" which makes good the claim .
THE HOME OF TUX CHIMES . The night wind has a dismal trick of wandering round and roncd a building of that sort [ a church ] , and moaning as it goes ; and of trying , with its unseen ft hand , the windows and the doors ; and seeking out S ^ o me crevice by which to enter . And when it has got In—as one not finding what it seeks , whatever that may be—it wails and howls to issue forth again ; and not content with stalking through the aisles , and gliding round and round the pillars , and tempting the detp organ , soars up to ; the roof , and strives to rend the rafters : then flings itself despairingly upon the stones below , and passes , muttering , into the vaults . Anon , it comes up stealthily , and creeps along the walls : seeming to read , in whispers , the inscriptions , sacred
to the dead . At soine of these , it breaks out shrilly , as with laughter ; and at others , moans and cries as if it were lamenting . It has a gho&tly sound , too , lingering within the altar : where it seems to chant , in its wild way , of wrong and murder done , and false Gods worshipped ; in defiance of the Tables of the Law , which look so fair and smooth , but are so flawed aud broken . Tjgh ? Heaven preserve us sitting snugly round the fire 1 It has an awful voice , that wind at midnight singing in a church ! But high up in the steeple ! There the foul blast roars and whistles ! High up iu the steeple , where it is free to come and go through many an airy arch and loophole , and to twist and twine itself about the giddy stair , and twirl the groaning weathercock , and make the very
towtr shake and shiver ! High up in the steeple , where the belfry is , and iron rails are ragged with rust , and sheets of lead and copper shrivel by the changing weather , crackle , and heaye beneath the unaccustomed tread ; and birds stuff shabby nests into corners of old Oaken joists and bvams \ and dust grows old and grey ; and speckled spiders , indolent and ikt with long security , swing idly to and fro in the vibration of the bells , and never lose their hold upon their thread-spun castles in the air , or climb up , sailor-like , in quick alarm , or drop upon the ground and ply a score of nimble legs to save a life ! High up in the steeple of an old church , far above the light and murmur of the town , and far below the flying clouds that shadow it , is the wild and-dreary place at night : and high up in the steeple of an old
church , dwelt the Chimes 1 tell of . But return we to Toby . Toby had contracted a liking for the Bells ' : — " And though I had said his love , I would not have re-Called the vroru , though it would scarcely have expressed his complicated feeling . For , being but a simple man , he invested them with a strange and solemn character . They -were so mysterious , often heard and never seen ; so high up , so far off , so full of such a deep strong melody , that he regarded them with a species of awe ; ana sometimes when he looked up at the dark arched windows in the tower ; he half expected to be beckoned to by something which was not a bell , and yet was what he heard so often sounding in the Chimes . For all
thiB , Toby scouted -with indignation a certain flying rumour that the chimes were haunted , as implying the possibility of their being connected with any evil thing . In short , they were very often in his ears , and very Often in Ids thoughts , but always in ibis good opinion ; and he very often got such a crick in his neck by staring ¦ with his mouth wide open , at the steeple where they .. 'hung , that he was fain to take an extra trot or two , afterwards to cure it . " The very thing he was in the act of doing one cold day , when the last drowsy sound of twelve o ' clock jnst struck , was humming like a melodious monster of a bee , and not by any means a busy bee , all throngh the steeple .
TOBI ' S OB 8 EBTTATI 0 N . " ' Dinner tune , eh . ' * said Toby , trotting up and down before the church . ' Ah 3 * ' Toby ' s nose was Yery red , and his eyelids were very red , and he winked very much , and his shoulders were very near his ears , and his legs were very stiff ; and altogether he was evidently a long way upon the frosty side of cool . " ' Dinner-time , eh : ' repeated Toby , using his right muffler like an infantine boxing-glove , and pnnishing his chest for being cold . ' Ah-h-h-b !' " He took a silent trot , after that , for a minute or two .
" ' There ' s nothing , ' said Toby , ' more regular in its coining round than xiinner-tiiue , und nothing less regular in its coming round than dinner . That ' s the great difference between ' em . It ' s took me a long time to find it out . I wonder whether it would be worth any gentleman ' s while , now , to buy that obserwation for the papers , or tbe Parliament ' . '" ' Toby , wrapped in a "brown study" continues his " obserwations . " Toby has evidently heard of the Malthusian Philosophy ; perhaps located near a church , he has heard that such is the philosophy of Cbarles J oh . \ , Bishop Bjloomfiild : —
TOBV ' 8 D 0 CBT 1 NGS . " ' It seems as if we can ' t go right , do right , or be righted , ' said Toby . I hadn ' t much schooling myself when I was young , and I can't make out whether we have anj business on the face of the earth , or not . Sometimes I think we must have a little , and sometimes I think we must be intruding . I get so puzzled sometimes that I am not even able to make up my mind whether there is any good at all in us , or whether we are born bad . We seem to do dreadful things ; we seem to give a deal of trouble ; we are always being complained of and
guarded against . One way or . other we nil the papers . Talk of a New Year ! ' 6 aid Toby , mournfully . ' I can bear up as well as another man at most times ; better than a good many , for I am as strong as a lion , and all men an ' t ; but supposing it should really be that we have no right to a Sew Year : —supposing we really are intruding ? '" Probably Toby had been led to reflect on the possibility of there really being ' . ' no seat for him at Nature's board , " from the fact that he was too often without a dinner . From his reverie Toby is aroused by the voice of his daughter .
HAI . THDS UEFOTED . <• Why , father , father ' . " said the pleasant voice again . Toby heard it this timei—started—stopped—and shortening his sight , which had been directed a long way off as seeking for enlightenment in the very heart of the approaching year , found himself face to face with his own child , and looking close into her eyes . Bright eyes they were . Eyes that would bear a world of looking in before their depth was fathomed . Dark eyes , that reflected back the eyes which searched them ; not flashingly , or at the owner ' s will , but with a clear , calm , honest , patient radiance , claiming kindred with that light which heaven called into being : eyes that were beautiful and true , and beaming with hope . "With hope so voung and fresh—with hope so buoyant ,
vigorous , and bright , despite the twenty years of work and poverty on which they had looked , that they became a voice to Trotty Veck , and safd : " I think we have some business here—a little !" Poetry that , my masters . ' Nature pleading through the affections for those truths which a brutish miscalled philosophy would fain , —but happily in vain , strives to , —extinguish . Toby ' s daughter , Meg , has most unexpectedly brought him a dinner of hot tripe , which he enjoys seated on a door step . While thus employed the daughter imparts to iim her love for Richard , a Stalwart blacksmith , who Las -rowed to Tred her on New Year's-day . Hear how beautifully the brighteyed girl pleads what we shall take the liberty to
call—OCB PHILOSOPHY . "He says then , father , another year is nearly gone , and where is the use of waiting on from year to year , when it is so unlikely tye shall ever be better off than we are now . He says we are pooT now , father , and -we shall be poor then ; but we are young now , and years will make us old before we know it . He says that if we wait , people in our condition , until we see our way quite clearly , the way will be a narrow one indeed—the common way—the grave , father . * * * * " And how hard , father , ta grow old , and die , and think we might have cheered and helped each other ! How hard in all our lives to love each other ; and to grieve apart , to see each otht r working , changing , growing old and grey . Even if I got the better of it , and forgot him ( which I never coxfld ) , 0 , father dear , to have a heart so full as mine is now , and live to have it slowly drained out every drop , without the recollection of one happy moment of a woman ' s life , to stay behind and comfort me , and make me better !"
The father and daughter are here joined by the lattert sweetheart , Richard , -and almost at the same moment the door opens , and the footman of Alder man Cute nearly puts his foot into the tripe dish . Mr . Cute is attended by two friends , Mr , Filer , a cold-blooded political economist—Mr . Dickens paints the class to the life—and a red-faced gentleman , in a blue coat , representing a Tory of the old school , whose eteatal prate is about " the good old
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f times ! ' ? Tnese thre ^ worthies denounce poor Toby formating tripe ^« s 'beingrinfamoual ^ eKfarsvagant ,-anu calculated to bring ruin on the country . ALDERMAN CCTE ' S WAV OF SUUSG ¦ WITH THE COMMON
PEOPLE . ' Now , you know , ' said the Alderman , addressing his two friends , with a self-complacent smile upon his face , which was habitual to him , 'Iain a plain man , and a practical inan ; and I go to work in a plain , practical way * That ' s my way . There is not the least mystery or difficulty iu dealing with this ; sort of people , if you only understand ' , and can talk to ' em in their own manner . Now , you porter ! Don't you ever tell me , or anybody else , my friend 4 , that you ha ' vn't always enough to eat , and of the best ;• because I know better . I have tasted your tripe , you know , and you can't " chaff" * me . You understand what " chaff" means , eh ? That ' s the right word , isn't it ? Ha , ha , ha ! I-ord bless you , ' Said the Alderman , turning to his friends
again , 'it ' s the easiest thing on earth fo deal With this sort of people , if you only Understand * em . ' "Famous man for the common people , Alderman Cute ! Never out of temper with them ! Easy , affable , joking , knowing gentleman ! "' You see , my friend , ' pursued the . Alderman , 'there ' s a great deal of nonsense talked about want— " hard up , " ion know : that ' s the phrase , isn't it ? ha , ha , ha !—and I intend to put it down . That ' s all I Lord bless yom , ' said the Alderman , turning to his friend again , ' you mayput down anything among thl 9 sort of people , if you only know the way to set about it !' " Trotty took Meg ' s hand and drew it through his arm . He didn't seem to know what he was doing though .
•' ' Your daughter , eh V said the Alderman , chucking her familiarly under the chin . "' Always affable with the working classes , Alderman Cute ! Knew what pleased them ! Not a bit of pride . " Where ' s her mother ? ' asked that worthy gentleman . " ' Dead , ' said Toby . ' Her mother got up linen ; and was called to heaven when she was born . ' '" Not to get up linen there , 1 suppose , ' remarked the Alderman pleasantly . " Toby might or might not have been able to separate his wife in heaven from her old pursuits . But query : If Mrs . Alderman Cute had gone to heaven , would Mr . Alderman Cute have pictured her as holding any state or station there ?
From denouncing tripe , the precious trio proceed to the abusing of Matrimony : —
A POLITlCAt ECOKOMIST ' S LAMENT , " ' And you ' re making love to her , are 'you V said Cute to the young smith . " ' Yes , ' returned Richard , quickly , for he was nettled by the question . ' , we are going to be married on New Year ' s Day . ' " "What do you mean 5 ' cried Filer , sharply , « married ! " Why , yes , we ' re thinking of it , master , ' said Richard . 1 "We ' re rather in a hurry , you see ,: In case it should be Put Down first . ' '
" ' Ah ! cried Filer , with a groan . ' Put that down , indeed , Alderman , and you'll do something . Married ! Married !! The ignorance of the first principles of political economy on the part of these people ; their improvidence ; : their wickedness ; is , by Heavens ! enough to—Now look at that couple , will you V ' ' Vfeil ! They were worth looking at . And marriage seemed as reasonable and fair a deed as they need have in contemplation . ' " ' A man may live to be » s old as Methusaleh , ' said Mr . Filer , ' and may labour all his life for the- benefit of SUcll people as those ; and may heap up facts on figures , facts on figures , facts on figures , mountains high ft > ui dry-, and ho can no more hope to persuade ' em that they--have no right or business to be married , than 1
he can hopeto persuade ' era that , they have no . earthly ri £ ht or business to be bora , - ^ niT tftat WO tap ^ rjthey haru ' t . . We reduced it to ' a mathematical certainty long ago . ' ¦ ¦ ¦ '' . Our readers who are also readers'Of Punch , —and we expect but few are otherwifle ; -r-niust be prettj . yrell acquainted with the doin ^ . ? of , Peter the : Great ( ass ) , who hesitates at nothing , and is omnimpotent at pitting down" all delinquents , from Joseph Ady to Giant Despair : —he puts all down : a mighty genias is Peter ! It strikes us we have ere now seen the veritable original of Alderman Cute , presiding at the City Mansion House Police Court . We may be wrong : but doubtless Alderman Sir Peter Laurie can say whether we are right .
THE MAN " WOT ' B DETERMINED TO PUT DOWN 8 riCIDE , " " Alderman Cute was mightily diverted , and laid his right forefinger on the side of his nose , as much as to say to both his friends , ' Observe me , will you . Keep your eye on the practical man ! ' and called Meg to him . " ' Come here , my girl , ' said Alderman-Cute . " The young blood of her lover had been mounting , wrathfully , within the last few minutes ; and he was indisposed to let her come . But , setting a restraint upon himself , he came forward with a stride as Meg approached , and stood beside her . Trotty kept her hand within his arm still , but looked from face to face as wildly as a sleeper in a dream . " Now I ' m going to give you a word or two of good
advice , my girl , ' said the Alderman , in his nice easy way . 1 It ' s my place to give advice , you know , because I ' m a justice . You know I ' m a justice , don't you V " Meg timidly said , 'Yes . ' But everybody knew Alderman Cute wag a justice ! 0 , dear , so active a justice always ! Who Btich a mote of brightness In the public eye as Cute ! ¦ '" You are going to be married , you say , ' pursued the Alderman . ' Very unbecoming and indelicate In one of your sex ! But never mhul that . After you are married you'll quarrel with your husband , and come to be a distressed wife . You may think not ; but you will , because I tell you so . Now I give you fair warning , that I have made up my mind to put distressed wives down . So don ' t be brought before me . You ' ll have
children—boys . Those boys will grow up bad , of course , and run wild in the streets , without shoes and Stockings . Mind , my youflg friend ! I'll convict ' summarily , every one , for I am determined to put boys , without shoes and stockings , down . Perhaps your husband v % -ill die young ( most Ukely ) and leave you with a baby . Then you'll be turned out of doors , and wander up and down the streets . Jfow don ' t wander near me , my dear , for I am resolved to put all wandering mothers down . All young mothers , of all sorts and kinds , it ' s my determination to put down . Don ' t think to plead illness as an excuse with me ; or babies as an excuse with me ; for all sick persons and young children ( I hope you know the Church service , but I'm afraid not ) I am determined to put down . And if you
attempt , desperately , and ungratefully , and impiously , and fraudulently attempt to drown yourself , or hang yourself , I'll have no pity on you , for I have made up my mind to put all suicide down . If there is one thing , ' said the Alderman , with his self-satisfied * smile , ' on which I can be said to have made up my mind more than on another , it is to put suicide down . So don't try it on . That ' s the phrase , isn ' t it ? Ha , ha ! Now we understandeach other . ' "Toby knew uot whether to be agonised or glad to see that Meg had turned a deadly white , and dropped her lover ' s hand *
" ' As for you , you dull dog , ' said the Alderman , turning with even increased cheerfulness and urbanity to the young smith , ' what are you thinking of being married for ? What do you want to be marked for , you silly fellow ! If I was a fine young strapping chap like you , I should be ashamed of being milksop enough to pin myself to a woman ' s apron-strings ! Why , she'll be an old woman before you are a middle-aged man ! And a pretty figure you ' ll cut then , with' a draggle-tailed wife and a croWd of squalling children crying after you wherever you go !' " Oh , he knew how to banter the common people , Alderman Cute !"
Here for the present we must close our notice of the Chimet . Next week wo shall return to them , and put our readers in possession of what becomes of Trotty , Meg , and Richard . As a Blacksmith figures in the Chimes , and as we doubt not all our fair readers will by this time be the entertainers of feelings sympathetic for the young Vulcan , only second in intensity to those of his loving Meg , we think we cannot do better than have a song , a right hearty and noble one , from the pen of the talented Charles Maokat , ( one of whose beautiful compositions appeared in our last year ' s Garland , ) in honour of the prince and father of the manly craft : —
TVEAL CJIV . Old Tubal Cain was a man of might , In the days when earth was young ; By the fierce red light of its furnace bright The strokes of his hammer rung ; And he lifted ; high his brawny hand . On the iron glowing clear , Till tbe sparks rushed out in a scarlet rout , As he fashioned the sword and spear : And he sang . " Hurra for my handiwork ! Hurra for the spear and sword ! Hurra for the hand that 6 hall wield them well For he shall be King and Lord . " To Tubal Cain came many a one ,
As he wrought by his roaring fire , And each one pray'd for a strong steel blade As the crown of his own desire ; And he made them weapons sharp and ftrong , Till they shouted loud for glee , And gave him gifts of pearls and gold And spoils of the forest free . And they sang " Hurra for Tubal Cain , Who hath given us : strength anew ; Hurra for the smith , hurra for the fire , And hurra fer the metal true !"
But a sudden change came o ' er his head , Ere the setting of the sun , And Tubal Cain was filled with pain For the evil he had done ; He saw . that men , with rage and heat , Made war upon their kind , And the land was red with the blood . they ahed In their lust for carnage blind , And he said "Alas , that ever I made , Or that skill of mine should plan , The spear and the sword for men whose Apj Is to slay their fellow-man !"
And for many a day old Tubal Cain Sat brooding o ' er his woe ; And his hand forbore to smite the ore , And his furnace smouldered low :
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But he rose , at last , with a cheerful face , --And a bright courageous- « ye , ..... And bared his strong right arm for work , While the quick flames mounted high . And he sang , " Hurra ! for my handiwork !" And the red sparks lit the air ; Not alone for the blade was the bright steel made ; And he fashion'd the * first plough-share . And men , taught wisdom from the past , In friendship joined'their hands , Hung tbe sword In thefhall , the spear on the wall , And plQugh'd the willing lands ; And sang " nurra for old Tubal Cain ,
Our staunch good friend is he ; And for the plough-share and the plough To him our praise shall be ; But while oppression lifts its head , Or tyrant would be ilord , Though we may thank Mm for the pkmgh , Well not forget the sword !" The great length of our extracts from Mr . Diekens's works compels us to omit for this week many things we had intended to have said , and also several choice poetical pieces jwe had prepared for our Garland . We say for thi 3 week ; for hi our next we shall resume . If in this number of the Star our Garland appears imperfect , be it understood that it
is not as yet Completed , j In the meantime , reader , we -wish thee and thine " A Merbt Ghhistmas !" If thou art a Scrooge ( which Heaven forbid !) , we wish thee a quittance of ; all thy evil spirits , and a regeneration as complete as that worked in the hero of Diekens ' s Carol . 1 If thou art a Cratchit , we wish thee ( we repeat ) such a Christmas Goose and Pudding as Dickens has pictured ; and we would help thee to , were we j " the Ghost of Christmas Present . " And if thou art like unto Scrooge ' s nephew , we don't knowj that we could wish thee aught better than the good heart thou wilt in that
case be the possessor of ; unless indeed it be the additional good of having the means at thy command to obey the dictate ^ of such a heart . To the rich we say , give to youf fellow creatures who are poor : and to the poor we say , sympathise with each other , and strive to ease ^ he heavy load which , like Pilgrims , you are forced ! to bear . To each and all we wish Plenty , Beneficence , and Happiness ; and all we ask in return is , Jthat each and all will join US in drinking with flowing g lasses to those lights of life—The Poets ; arid , first and foremost , to France and Freedom ' s poet , Beranger ! In his glorious strains we ask our friends , with nine times nine , and one cheer more , to chant the praises of
WOMAN AND WWE . In varying hues of grief and mirth . How fruitful Nature ' s face appears ! Beneath its dark wing rolls the earth , In ruins , blood , and tears . But beauty reigns where ' er we go , And see , with grapes the vines are clad ; Let woman smile , let good wine flow , And lo ! the world is glad . A deluge o ' er each Jand hath flown ; But ah ' . how few , howl very few ,
Some sheltering ark have ever known , Whom misery ' waves pursue ! When flies the dove , when bends the bow Aliove that waste of waters sad—Let woman smile , let gooil wine flow , And lo . ' the world is glad ! In dreary , dark , and funereal gloom , A withered land ' neath ! Etna lies , Which hurls from out its jtmrning womb T he Hell against the skies ! Its rage expires , and muttering low
Rests that mysterious mountain mad-Let woman smile , let good wine flow , And lo ! the world is glad . ' The frightful vulture of the East , The deadly plague with ! hoarse voice calls And man , to furnish forth her feast , Before her flying—falls ! Heaven is appeased—with angel glow Soft Pity tends these victims sad !—Let woman smile—let good wine flow—And lo ! the world is glad . Stern Mars awakes his cruel fires ,
And rolls his car of sanguine hue , And the same laud that drank the sire ' s , Still drinks the sou ' s blood too ! But man grows tired and Stops the blow , And nature whispers , svveet tho' sad—Let woman smile—let gooil wine flow—And lo ! the world is gla < l ! Instead of blaming Nature now , See Spring ' s bright tresses stream above , 0 ! let us wreathe her fragant brow With earth's best roses , joy and love . ' Spite of tbe slavish ills we Jrnow , 'Mid mouldering ruins ij fy clad , Let woman smile—let good wine flow—And , lo ! the world is glad !
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Novel Mode of Paying fob the Marriage Ceremony . — On Sunday morning last an extraordinary proceeding took place at St . Mary Abbotts , Kensing ^ ton , after the marriage of two individuals . The ceremony haying been performed ^ by the Rev . Mr . Stevens before the morning service , the bridegroom , a waiter at an hotel in the neighbourhood , went into the vestry-room to pay the usual fees , his new-made br ide being directed by him to wait at the porch till he had settled . The bridegroom , upon being told tbe amount of the fees he had to pay ( 8 s . 6 d . ) commenced
deliberately to count a vast number of farthings , which he placed four in a pile . ] He went on this way until the table was nearly covered , and the clerk suggested to him that it would be ! better , as he seemed determined to act in such an extraordinary manner , to count out the number at once ; but , heedless of the advice , hs went on till the little piles came to the amount he . had to pay . The iclergyman could not $ & $ till " the end of the tedious financial operation , a ^ he had to read the prayerfelin the church . The farthings were soon change&fij £ « ber at a neighbouring house , and the whimsical ferjaegroom joined the bride , who was shivering witjh cold at the church door . l
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BrsTi . ES versus Providence .- — "There is a Providence that shapes our ends , " saith the immortal William Shakspeare ; - " and yetlaSieB wear bustles . A Yankee . Barrister pro ^ ecptjng , a woman for maltreating her infirm husband ^/ exclaimed , th&t . most of the sex werejdevils ; Seeing ' sevJ . nil genteelfeigales ia court , he sought to correctTjj ^ fau ^ -pqs by aqomg , " but the rest are . angels , and many of tfieife ^ are present . " . . . ¦ „ ' ' ,. „ . . .. '; , A Toast for Teetotallers . — "Here ' s to the ' man
who cut down the . trees , who cleared the land ., who ploughed the ground , who plhntc ^ the corn , which fed the goose , that raised the < juiHV /> -Mcli . formedthe ' pen , with which was written the total abstinence pl © 44 & " Optics . —The Puke of Cuniberiand tomJ ) r \ Price that he had read his pamphlet' on the Katiohi'sl I ) ebt with much delight , and sat up so late to finish it , jthat it had almost blinded him , "Rather strangc , " . ^ aid the author , "that it should , have such an efteet on your Royal Highness , for it has opened the eyes of eveiYbody else .
Measure for Measure . —A Quaker at any inn called for some porter , and observing the pint deficient in quantity , thus addressed the landlord : — " gray friend ; how many butts of beer dost thou draw in a month ? " " Ten , sir , " replied the publican . " . . And thou wouldst like to draw eleven it * thou couldst , " rejoined Ebenezer . " Certainly , " exclaimed -the smiling landlord . "Then I will tell theehow , friend , " said broadbrim : "Jill thy measures . " -, The Watering Jbw . —According to a letter ffom Leipsic , fourteen translations of AJ . Eugene Sue ' s romance , the " Wandering Jew , " are now publishing in Germany . —Augsburg Gazette . The Polka—Why is the Polka like bitter beer ?—Because there are so many hops in it . The Rose has Thorns . —Milton , when blind , married a shrew . The Duke of Buckingham cajled her a rose . " 1 am no judge of colours , " replied Milton , " but I dare say you are right , for I feel the tnornS dailv . "
Boswell asd tbe Bear . —Boswell asked Johnson once whether he had heard that people compared him to a mad dog , "Have you heard , sir , " said the Doctor , "that people compare you to the tin-kettle tied to my tail ?" Gentility . —A very irritable Irish baronet dnce fancied himself insulted by a country bumpkin who could not trace his blood for more than 300 years from labour and shaking his horsewhip in his face exclaimed , " Damn you , sir , if you were a gentleman I'd horsewhip you to-night and shoot you to-morrow morning . " " Thank you , Sir John ; its not the first time that I have had to return thanks to providence for not being a gentleman . " was the shrewd reply .
A Fact . —About fifty years ago , in the " goodold times" when beating was cheap in Ireland , there happened to be five or six cases of manslaughter in different parts of the county of Kerry the same day , and the -weather being very hot the coroner could mot hold an inquest upon each in sufficient time ; and therefore in order to satisfy the friends of one of the deceased who followed Jiim thirty miles , he said he would summon a jury there , and without view of the body take their evidence , if they could swear tojthe facts . This appeared perfectly satisfactory . The jury was instantly summoned , and the whole business concluded in about half an hour by a verdict against nine of the Shanuahans . three of the Macartys and
four of the Doolans , for the wilful murder of Timothy DriseoU . The accused were all sent to prison ; and the first day of the assizes true bills against them were presented to the grand jury , and the name of Timothy Driscoll indorsed on the bill , to be examined as the pr incipal witness . After a few questions by the foreman of the grand jmy , he observed that the name of the witness and the deceased were the same ; and asked him : "Witness , were you any relation to the deceased ? " " To the deceased is it ? " replied iUm ; " wisha-, my God , aint I the deceased myself <"' " No , no , I mean the murdered man ; are you any thing to the murdered man V " My God , aint J telling you that I ' m the murthered man myself ! Look here , " says
Tim , showing a huge wound in his head : " wasn t that enough to kill an ox ? and look here , and here , and here , " exhibiting all his wounds , observing : " Wisha then if 1 wasn ' t murthered that night the devil a Kerry man was ever murthered since . " In this dilemma the foreman of the grand jury thoug h ^ it best to consult the judge ; and proceeding to the court accosted him as follows :- — " My lord , we are rather , in a predicament , " and then related the circumstance ; adding , ' 'Whatwe wish to know , my lord , is , if under the peculiar circumstances of the case we can find bills against the Shannahans , Macartys , and Doolans For manslaughter , as DriscolTs not dead ?" His lordship , as might be expected , looked hard at the
applicant , and then significantly said "No . " One Discharge at a Time . —When the Irish yeomanry corps were first embodied , the men were in the habit of not discharging their muskets , in order that they might preserve the cartridges . The captain of a corps , not distinguished by a very military ear , had had this prank frequently practised on him . An old martinet was one day inspecting the corps , wliose _ ear was shocked by the irregularity of the fire , and he observed to the captain— " What the devil do you mean , sir ? these men can't fire j do you call that a discharge ? not a man to the right has fired ! " whereinlerriuie vcugeujiw
upon wie captain . a rage voweu against the right wing , if , as he said , "it didn't make its share of noise the next time . " When thewbrd " fire" -was given , bang went the right , sure enough , and up flew half a score of muskets , and b ^ ck staggered as many men . The poor captain , flabbergasted , ran to take up one of the muskets , when the owner , who had partially recovered , roaredout at the top of liis voice , " Ogh captain jewel , captain jewel ; wisha , for God's sake , don't go near it or touch it , for by gor there ' s nine charges in it vet ! that ' s only one of them gone off ; and they will all blow up and turn . "
A Farmer's Corps for Service . — In the year 1798 , when the Irish weavers and all the little Protestants were just as loyal as the loyal royal Repealers of the present day , these worthies volunteered their services to constitute a volunteer cavalry corps in the neighbourhood of Galway , of which the gallant captain was a parson . Government . received daily accounts of the loyalty , the discipline , and the courage of this wonderful corps : and at length notice was received by the gallant parson , that Lord Cathcart would be in Galway on the following Monday to inspect the loyal royal Protestant tinkers and tailors . No time was to be lost . Not one of the gallant troopers had ever mounted a horse , norses had to be borrowed , and
tbe most to be made of the time . Well , Monday caine , and Lord Cathcart came , and great was the consternation . There were the tinkers and tailors ; and there was the dog ' s-meat , with long tails , and short tails , and no tails at all ; with saddles , and without saddles ; with bridles and halters ,- and without bridles or halters . Seeing the great Protestant zeal manifested , his lordship was willing to make all allowance for a first experiment . The troop was put in motion , and his lordship , to encourage , vouchsafed a familiar observation , such as , " How long liave you been in the riding-school ? " No answer . " Pray what ' s your name ? " Still no answer . '' Have you ever belonged . " A 4 * ^^ ^ £ t ITT -. _ —V- ^ _ ,-. _ w . nl *«* A ? \ ouiu
* . to any other corps Jo reply . rr yyu voxuuteer into the line ? " Mum , and a sagacious look . The General could withstand this indifference' no longer , and roaring out at the top of his voice to the gallant parson , exclaimed " What the devil do you mean ; have these fellows no tongues ? " " Why , General ? " " Why I have spoken to that man , and that man , and that fellow , and not a word could I get out of them . " " Come here , Tim Murphy ; why didn't vou answer the General , you blackguard , when he was io civil as to speak to you ? " " Answer him is it , " said Tim ; " wisha , by Shasus , captain , I'd enough to do to mind my riding , without talking to the likes of him . The devil from a , but I be in dread of my life to spake while I ' m riding : by the powers , I'd fall off as sure as day . "
TniRTY Tears Ago . — Byron , in 1814 , wrote to his friend Tom Moore , to apprise him that he was an accepted lover . The letter ( which is as follows ) is an admirable specimen of easy and familiar correspondence : — " Newstead Abbey , Sept . 20 , 1844 . ; " Here ' s to her who long \ Hath . waAied-the-poet ' s sigh ! The girt who gave to song What gold could never buy . '' " My dear Moore , ^—I am going to be married .-that is , I am accepted , and one usually hopes the rest will follow . My mother of the Gracchi ( that are to be ) the
you think too straight-laced for me , although paragon of' only children , ' and invested with 'golden opinions of all sorts of men , ' andVfull of ' most blest conditions' as Desdemona herself . , Miss Milbaiike is the lady ; and I have her father ' s invitation to proceed there in my elect capacity ; which , howler , I cannot do till I have settled some business m London , and I get a blue coat . She is said to be an hefcess ; but of that I know nothing . certamlv , and shall not inquire . But I do know that she has talents , and excellent qualities ; and you wilTnot deny herJudgment , after having refused six f tutors and taken me . "Tours , Btboj * . '
Seeing Throdgh It . — " What is light ? " asked a schoolmaster of the booby of the claaa . " A sovereign that isn't full weight & light , " was tho prompt reply . » Aobbe-to Differ . — " You are nogentlemanv' < isaid an angry disputant to his antagonist . " Are you V quietly - asked the other . " Yes , I am , sir . ' - ' 'jthen I am . not , " was the caustic reply . : Aix Ore , ash no Change . — Agentleman finding his servant Intoxicated , said ; " 'What ! drunk again , Sam ? I scolded you for being drunk last night ,- and here you are , drunk again / "No , massa : same drunk , massa ; same drunk , " - ^^ replied Sambo . A Manly Advertisement . — There is something very manly ( says aCanadranpaper ) about the fpllow inff advertisement biibliahed w Portlandby oneTQf the
fair sex : —" This ia to certify , that I KLzgbettt " Wright ,- have left my httsband ^ bed am . ™>* rd on account of bia misconduct . I do , th ^? £ j § ife £ all right and title to him for life , as , I flatM # y » eir that I can take care of myself , as I have alway ^ done since and before marriage . ¦ . , f , . '
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i December 31 , 3844 . _ THE NORTHERN STAR . I 3
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A BOWL OF " PUNCH , " FRESH BREWED A . CHBIBTMjLS ; CABOL . To Church betimes ! The Christmas chimes A . re calling high and low in ; To Church then all , both great and 6 mall ! Chorus of iTKniy voices . We ve not a coat to gqj in . ' Like our old sires , with roaring tires , The fangs of winter brjaving , Huge Jogs pile high , to sit thereby . Chorus , We ' ve not a single shaving ! Good Christmas fare is physic rare To warm the regions inner ; Plum-pudding join to stout sirloin .
Chorus , We ' ve not a crust for dinner ! Fill glass and bowl , each ; jovial soul , As round the hearth we close in ; $ ur wine is bright in its ruddy light . CkorusA Our very water ' s frozeh ! Right late we'll sup , andjkeep it up Till time to morn shall creep on ; Then sink to rest in downy nest . Chorus . ] Vf e ' ve not a bed to sleep on ! Loud be the song , the laughter long ; Our joy n . o care shall leaven ; Christmas is here but once a year . Chonis ; For that , at least , thani heaven !
n _ r ~ sss > imr- i * Aqbicdi / tobal McsECM . —Tlte Agricultural Museum , lately opened under the auspices of the Royal Society of Agriculture , will well ' repay a visit to the rooms of the Society in Hanover Square . For the information of persons visiting London , we supply an imperfect catalogue , which will direct the visitor to what ape ceriainly the Lions of the Museum , i Case 30 , —Very curious , containing specimens of " The English Labourer" ( vulg . " The Country ' s pride" ) , natives of the various agricultural counties , presented by different boards of guardians . \ No . 1 . A Buckinghamshire labourer . — Stands six feet high—weight , nine stone—colojur 6 allow—eyes sunkbones very prominent . The smbck-froclc nine years old —breeches ragged—boots very bad—found in damp cottages . Fed upon bread and water , with a little bacon . When taken , attempted to destroy himself in the House . Mind uncultivated . Habits juKcti and brutal .
No . 2 . A Norfolk labourer . —Characteristics as above . This is one of the incendiary species . Kos . 3 , 4 , 5 . Essex , Wiltshire , and Somersetshire labourer } . —The curious visitor is requested to observe the clothes of these interesting specimens . | The cases by the side of each contain portions of their usual food , and a week ' s wages . | Case 40 . —Contains a treasure , ^ which is indeed unique , and which the Society feels justly : proud of : — A new coat !! purchased by a -labourer with a family , on 7 s . a week wages ! As far a's the Society can learn , the only one ever exhibited ! j Case 54 . —The inentical bat used by Lord Coningsby in the game at cricket played by his Lordship with real labourerB . There is always a crowd round this ease , and no wonder . j Case 60 . —A sovereign , returned by Lord Radnor to a poor tenant on quarter-day ; senit from High worth . By many considered the gem of the collection .
Case 100 . —Very old 'duties : of property , " discovered lately in Holdernesse-house , by Ithe Marquis of Londonderry . When furbished they have a very imposing appearance , and were brought out with great effect by the noble owner at a recent dinner given to his tenantry in Ireland . j Case 120 . —Numerous specimens of a new invention called "the rights of labour . " JThe ingenious patentee declares that these rights were known to our forefathers , though the secret has been lost . | He expects great results from their re-introduction . i
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Citation
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Northern Star (1837-1852), Dec. 21, 1844, page 3, in the Nineteenth-Century Serials Edition (2008; 2018) ncse.ac.uk/periodicals/ns/issues/vm2-ncseproduct518/page/3/
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