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~" " March 6, 1869/} THE TOMAHAWK. * 109...
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TO A STARR,
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Up Thi When Now above nk to you Hull flo...
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THE AMATEURS! THE AMATEURS// By an ex-Amateur of Two Feet.
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Specimen Three.—Augustus Actor. Noodle, ...
Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software. The text has not been manually corrected and should not be relied on to be an accurate representation of the item.
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Note: This text has been automatically extracted via Optical Character Recognition (OCR) software. The text has not been manually corrected and should not be relied on to be an accurate representation of the item.
Additionally, when viewing full transcripts, extracted text may not be in the same order as the original document.
Volunteer March 1 Officers St.—" March R...
^ writing > wn cognomen . Smith , and will using be easily slips of recognized paper instead , and of ignored cards when the same time by the entire family . the March Crystal $ th Palace . —An on extraordinary the stage in performance the transept will . The be Siamese given at benefit Twins will of themselves be engaged and to give the directors a dramatic of representation the Crystal Palace for the Company . The programme will be as follows : — Act 2 . —The Comedy of Errors . Dromio Dromio of of Syracuse Ephesus by by ENG Chang . . The Brothers After which Eng and , a Pas Chang de and Trois the Beautiful Circassian Lady . The Performance will conclude with Box and Cox . Box Cox Mrs . Bouncer . . The Eng Chang . Circas . sian Beauty . The audience will declare Eng the -Chang whole -ting Entertainment . positively Drama March by 6 th Mr . — . Tom First Watts night at Boucicoson the Royal . Teck There Theatre will be of such a new a moved competition , and the for press seats will that be the required benches to bring and stalls their own will chairs be re- . stone There . will The be action a scene will be representing stopped while a storm the scene over -painter the Eddy bows - from the top of the lighthouse . All the dramatic critics and authors during its will performance be present , . As will champagne discuss the will merits be allowed of the to piece cirfrom culate the freel managers y there will down be to no the faults call-boy to , speak will be of spoken . Every of body with , withdrawn lavish encomium on the Saturday the , leading following journals . . The piece will be in March the afternoon 7 th . — . Dean He Stanley will take will for preach text the in mote Westminster in our Abbey neighcountenance bour ' s eye , on . which He will he hazard will descant hrases with and the cannon usual words beam worth in his imitation by the other preachers p in this establishment .
~" " March 6, 1869/} The Tomahawk. * 109...
~ " " March 6 , 1869 /} THE TOMAHAWK . * 109 _
To A Starr,
TO A STARR ,
Up Thi When Now Above Nk To You Hull Flo...
Up Thi When Now above nk to you Hull flounder the 'll sink ponders world a with so little what long the ^ S , throng tarr you , , are ! —
The Amateurs! The Amateurs// By An Ex-Amateur Of Two Feet.
THE AMATEURS ! THE AMATEURS // By an ex-Amateur of Two Feet .
Specimen Three.—Augustus Actor. Noodle, ...
Specimen Three . —Augustus Actor . Noodle , the Amateur Chapte Critic r of the I . — Colcherbury Preface—In Guardian the Smoking said— -room Noodle — What on Fechter the part and Cha of " rles Bristles Mathews "—An — offe A r merry ana an joke acceptance about Punter . —The The opportunity for which I have long been panting has at length vengeance arrived upon . The that time empty has - " pated come , for monstrously the wreaking conceited of my idiot and — months the Actor and -Amateur years and . M years y soul for has this thirsted great occasion for months . I length have score , playe and of time d rehearsals " First ; I have Officers by been the " and called hundred " Second to , and performances Guards still I have " for "by any not the murmured smiled at — the have amateur never stage uttered manager a single ' s bullying complaint , . I have have grinned " first low a comedian melancholy . ' I grin have at eaten the biscuit " weird with waggery the " " leading of the lady man , . * " ' and I have have been drank considered sherry wine by the with " companies the " second " ( most old likely ) an amiable fool , while I have branded them—I allude to those I have hated done foes this , my with fellow a smile actors and —brutal with much buffoons smirking . ; done
Specimen Three.—Augustus Actor. Noodle, ...
ink bitter it because more revenge stinging I have ! Oh been ! i Oh that sure ! that I of could I my could make vengeance drive my away pen , conscious sharper from society of , my my that pest of the drawing-room , the amateur actor—that bore bilities in of the private c ? ountry M theatricals y house club ( , although ! But young wh a y should good lady who one I ) dream is has fond nothing over impossi play to do - foll with y Hercules is the fact ; and that as I for am my an wit amateur —well actor , the best myself proof ! I am in the do act fashion I am too very set ver by y bad the ! heads Almost of as the bad " as profession Augustus , " Noodle when I . You observe I write almost—the use of that word testifies to to my a calling brother — in what the amateur art ? But actor to ever our mutton admitted , or his rather inferiority to our Noodle calves' flesh . —let us talk of the subject of our sketch , Augustus man There of some he is forty —waiting summers to . be He sketched passed . the He first is a part young of old his he life ( Chambers not has at yet been Oxford finished , persecuting in , ) turns persecuting , in persecuting fast his briefless West his poor the End and genteel tradespeople parents histrionic public ; the . ; . second the The In third fact last in , first state . He this is , close -shaven according , , and l tall y wors , , chatty e ( much and worse egotistical ) than . the As we Club look smoking at him -room he is . standing As a rule with I avoid his back him as to a the decided fire of bore the ; but approach of fern upon seed him this and —for occasion swallow thy sake , it O . be most Now it remembered thou amiable art invisible of . Take readers this and , I atom will can hear " Well what , Noodle we say , . been doing anything lately 1 " , down " I at should Colc ^ think herbury so the ! " other he cries evening with with enthusiasm the Honourable . " I was Mrs " Were . Harry you ' s set good , and ?" played * Hamlet . '" critic "So of they the tell Colche me rbury , " says Guardian Noodle , said stroking that I his was chin much . better " The know than the , so old he ought Kean . to He have had been seen able us to both jud in ge the . " character , you " " Not Quite bad so , . " How lies do Noodle you like , with Fechter amiable ? " patronage ; " but he well doesn in romantic ' t play ' melodrama Hamlet' like , but I do he , you hasn know ' t sufficient . He is force all very for
whisper * Hamlet in . ' the Now last a row man of the told gallery me that . " they could hear my Mathews " " Yes Reall ; y wanted played ? Done ' to D anything see azzle my ' in reading the in the Game . comic He of is Speculation lin such e lately an old ? " . Charley friend , ing that brains I didn for ' t like —but to there disoblige , never him mind , thoug , I know h , you you know are prejudiced , it ' s findin Charley Oh , I don ' s favour ' t know . " , I think he ' s good . " confidentially " Oh yes , he by ' s a the good button fellow , smiles enough sweetl ; " y , and now says he takes in a tone me carrying " You think conviction not ? , " Reall But y then I Seen he ' anything actor ! of " Punter V Noodle " Wh , y in ? haven an ecstacy ' t you of heard surprise of at our my row ignorance ? " almost . screams lately " No . , I to suppose tell the you truth were , I in haven the right r t . ! I " ' ve been out of town " "So What people was it tell all me about , " answers ?" the bore . comedietta " Oh , only that this Lady . You Scarboro know we ' translated were going —Tkvo to play Husbands that little and one at Brayfield Bride ( not Park at . all Well bad— , of a course very good I was part to play in it ' for Bristles me ) down . ' It was all settled , when Punter declared that he wouldn ' t act unthey less he thought was cast he was for ' only Bristles humbugg . ' Everybody ing . Why laughed , fancy Punter at first in ; * Bristles " Well ? V " The notion is funny , but absurd !" I the wanted " Of world course awfull for I her couldn to j obli but ' ge stan her th at ; , that I couldn I I told would ' t possibly y do Scarboro anything give ' that up in men c Bristles ' say . ' if You they know heard it that wouldn Punter 't do was . What doing would * Bristles the * press ' over - my course head I ? declined Lady Scarboro appearing ' in weak the enoug piece h to . give She in begged ; so of me very hard to play j in fact , actually went down on her knees
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Citation
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Tomahawk (1867-1870), March 6, 1869, page 109, in the Nineteenth-Century Serials Edition (2008; 2018) ncse.ac.uk/periodicals/t/issues/ttw_06031869/page/11/
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